BOOYAH!

It’s time to not only celebrate my blog relaunch, but my two year blogging anniversary!!    And dude, the video totally captures the moment here.  I’m talking a blog wrecked to death, only to come back stronger, sleeker, and totally badass with some badass music cranking in the background and leather jackets and cool black vintage cars cruising the highway and let us go have a throwdown and kick some serious scum of the earth hellbags because baby,  I am back!

Yeah, I’m a little excited here. 

But really, what I just pulled off was a miracle that only God could have given me, and I now have the latest version of WordPress along with a new Who-is-your-DADDY theme that is all kinds of awesomeness. 

I still need to work out a few kinks and decide on a new photo gallery to use, but for all intents and purposes the site is now live, with a sleeker, faster look and a few new bells and whistles I think you’ll all enjoy.   For an idea of what’s new, see the little oval thingie jiggy to the right of each post title?  Go give that a click.

Cool, huh? 

In addition, you’ll now be able to edit comments as well.  I also dropped a few plugins, added a cache system and went with a 2 sidebar look again to reduce clutter.  Yes the ads are still there, but they are no longer as obtrusive as they used to be.  To be honest I got tired of having a larded up ad block embedded inside my posts, partly because I couldn’t quote or post any media content on the fly.  The ad would jam it up and I’d have to manually remove it in order for the post to show cleanly.  Not cool.  But I still need the ads though, since the 50 cents I’m making a day is paying for my newspaper, and I just don’t know how I could live without those two quarters a day, ya know?

As for the dark theme, I’m working on creating a white backdrop just for the posts and comments for easier reading (while still maintaining a dark look), so stay tuned there.  I might have gotten it done sooner but the theme kept overriding my color settings.  Regardless, let me know what you think.

It wasn’t easy though, but I got through it, and now I can finally enjoy the fruits of my labor…. except of course, Google just had to rain on my parade by dropping my pagerank from a 4 to a 3 while I was busy upgrading.    Really Google, why don’t you just suck my ass times a thousand?  Dweebs.

But meh, whatever.  I finally made a leapfrog in upgrading without having to spend a fortune to have a designer do it, my sleek black car will get a nice facelift and wax job by the end of the summer, and in a few more months I’ll be out of debt,  cruising the road and enjoying my new lease on life.  All I’ll need then is a weathered black leather jacket, and my life will truly be complete. 

Tags: anniversary, back in black, blog, blogging, css, google, music, pagerank, theme, update, upgrade, vintage, wordpress
Categories: Blog Fog
 
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“Let me just update this one file here….”

Sigh.

I had to go update a plugin last night because of a security hole, but unfortunately that update caused another plugin to break, so I had to go upgrade that plugin as well, which of course caused yet another plugin to break, so I went to upgrade that too, and before I knew it my spam blocker goes down in flames, I can’t preview comments anymore, my images no longer show up, my sidebars suddenly disappears, and then finally my entire blog goes up in smoke, the only thing left in its place being some cryptic error message telling me what an idiot I am and hahaha I suck.

Mother*&^% technology.

Things seem to be ok now, but my goodness, I was up till 4AM last night and had to work through the better part of today before things finally calmed down.

You know what, I think it’s time I gear up for a major revamp. I was gonna just say screw it and have a professional designer do it, but I think it’ll probably be better to set up a test blog closed from the public so I can play around with the latest blogging toys without tearing my hair out and spitting at people, and then when it’s stable enough I can release it for prime time with little fuss. That should also keep me busy enough so I don’t waste my time pining for a girl to love me since that’s never gonna happen because women all suck the ass of a hairy moose and should die in some horrible nuclear explosion bunch of monkey-faced harlot whores they be.

*ahem* Except my beloved womenly readers of course, who are all the very essence of perfection, virtue, and beauty.

See how I suck up to you guys so you’ll continue to love me and read my blog despite my crazy wild women-hating rants? I am so awesome.

Tags: blog, plugins, revamp, security hole, update, upgrade, women suck, wordpress
Categories: Blog Fog
 
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After years of computer use, you’d think I would have learned by now that it’s not always wise to upgrade to the latest and greatest software the minute it comes out. It’s just bad hoodoo, dude.

But of course the second Wordpress 2.1 had been released, I just HAD to download it and install it right away, thinking my blog would run twice as fast due to the much touted bugfixes and cleaner code 2.1 offered. I imagined angels singing and the sounds of songbirds chirping as visitors would come and gape in awe at the newfound speed and ease at which they would surf my newly upgraded website.

Nope. Instead, it broke a few of my plugins and then torpedoed my blog’s skin. I furiously deleted everything and uploaded my backup copy as soon as I could, then sat back with a tear in my eye as other bloggers happily went onto 2.1 nirvana.

But I noticed in the brief moment that I did manage to get 2.1 working, that my first reaction had been: “Gee, doesn’t seem to be any different from 2.0.” And now, right on the heels of 2.1’s release, the developers are planning to soon release 2.2. After looking at the features THAT release will offer, I realized it didn’t really offer anything that I didn’t already have with the plugins I was currently using now. So truthfully, other than updating Wordpress 2.0.X with security fixes, there really wasn’t a pressing need for me to upgrade. I also knew with each upgrade it would take days, weeks, months (and maybe never) for developers to update their plugins in order to ensure compatibility with the latest version of Wordpress.

So what’s the hurry really? My blog is working fine as it is, and besides it seems like every time I upgrade, some major component gets totally hosed, forcing me to downgrade once again. If it ain’t broke…

I’m sure eventually I’ll have to upgrade my blog some day, especially once the developers stop supporting security fixes for my now grandfathered version of Wordpress. But until that happens, I ain’t gonna do nuttin’. Nuttin’, you hear me? Nuttin’!!!

Instead, I cleaned up the backend by removing some useless or rarely used plugins, then installed and somehow managed to get WP-Cache working without a hitch. That should cache my main pages and hopefully speed up load time for visitors. Aren’t I thoughtful? My blog now seems to be running smoothly, all my plugins are functional, and I’m finally starting to enjoy blogging for real again. Life is good.

Now, if I could only get me a woman…

Tags: 2.0.x, 2.1, 2.2, angels, awe, backup copy, blog, bloggers, blogging, cache, compatibility, computer, developers, hurry, nirvana, pages, plugin, plugins, release, security, security fixes, update, updated, upgrade, upgraded, version, visitors, woman, wordpress, wp cache
Categories: Blog Fog
 
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