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It’s raining poo!

Lincoln Adams | July 25, 2007 @ 12:33 am

“We’re getting new computers!” Mick rubbed his hands together, barely able to contain his boyish glee.

“It’s about fricking time,” I said. We had been due for a major revamp of our network for the longest time now. In fact we were still using terminals that were older than me for our work here. The new network though promised to bring us brand spankin’ new computers, consolidate all our antiquated databases, and eliminate at least half of our workload. It was the kind of thing we could have only dreamt about, but it looked like it was finally going to become reality.

Several tech guys showed up with cables, and one of them discussed the new setup with Mick.

“Yeah we’re gonna replace these two terminals here, should happen in a couple of weeks or so.”

“Don’t forget we need an extra computer too. We have five guys here and four computers. That’s just not gonna work.”

The tech guy just ignored me and continued chatting with Mick. I seem to be getting a lot of that lately. Am I dead or something?

The tech guys started removing shingles to wire some cables through in preparation for our upgrade. One of them removed a shingle over the desk behind me….

And a flood of mouse droppings came pouring down.

“Sh–!!!”

It was everywhere. On our fax machine, the computer, court papers, the keyboard… just… everywhere.

We had a problem with this before, and basically nothing had been done about it. But now we were approaching critical mass. I mean seriously, does someone need to drop dead from mice poisoning here before people start to give a flying leap?

What truly depressed me though was the look on my coworkers’ faces. This look of defeatism, the sad reality that nothing they said would ever make a difference. They just stood there, shrugging their shoulders while the sky rained its pellet sized crap on us. Their tired eyes revealed virtually no will to fight.

Screw that. These bastards are gonna get a war from me. Let the poo fly, cuz it… is… ON.

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