Had a bad dream last night. I dreamt of having a chance encounter with the very comely Mary Katharine Ham, the conservative journalist and blogger from Townhall.com. We were inside the lobby of a museum, and I somehow managed to engage her in a conversation. Only problem was, I couldn’t understand a word she was…

My life has lately consisted of getting up in the morning, only to see yet another day go by without me experiencing the slightest bit of womanly affection. Eventually it’s gotten to the point where I’ve become so love starved, that even the slightest platonic gesture addressed in my general direction puts me in a…