Other posts related to phone

Merging the real world with my blog

Lincoln Adams | March 14, 2010 @ 7:38 pm

I’ve pretty much spent all day living vicariously through a friend of mine while he’s prancing about at SXSW, which made me think about some of the newer technology that’s being introduced and promoted there and how I could benefit from them.

After already having a few traveling adventures under my belt, I realized there were certain obstacles I needed to address, namely, how can I write and blog about my experiences in a fluid manner while it’s still fresh on my mind?  Usually I would get so caught up in exploring my new locale that by the time I got back to the hotel I was too exhausted to even stay awake, much less blog about the day.  Even worse was the exhausting work of uploading my photos, then organizing, captioning and tagging them all.  It’s the sort of thing that can literally take me hours to do.  Time is a luxury I cannot afford to lose during my travels, so this is something I need address before I go off on my next adventure, although that won’t happen until May.

For the time being, I am experimenting with ways I can interweave blogging vignettes I want to write with my day’s activities during my travels, without it being too much of a burden.  One of the ways I’m exploring doing so is by trying out geolocation apps on my iPod, such as Foursquare, Gowalla and Whrrl.  Whrrl comes closest to fulfilling the vision I have for this blog, by offering a way for me to disclose where I am and what I’m doing in a storytelling format, which is then uploaded and presented in the form of a slideshow I can embed onto my blog.  Even better, I can wirelessly upload pictures from my camera (not my camphone mind you, my REAL camera) directly to Whrrl using a special wifi memory card in place of a normal card.  With such a card I can also upload photos directly from my camera to Flickr and Youtube as well.  That… is… AWESOME.  The amount of time I could save would be astronomical.

From there, it’s just a matter of how I want to present it all on my blog.  Do I write about my travel experiences all in one lengthy post, or do I break them down into vignettes that are spread out via separate posts instead?  Something else I will have to experiment with.  In the meantime, let me know what you might prefer.  :D



Lessons learned from vacationing with an iPod

Lincoln Adams | October 17, 2009 @ 6:06 pm

I’m on the last leg of my vacation trip, and finally have some time to sit down and reflect on my experiences so far, especially when it comes to blogging about it all.

Rather than use an iPhone (which are not hearing aid compatible and relies on the crappy AT&T network), I went with the next best thing, an iPod Touch that I tether to my PDA Phone using Verizon’s Broadband Connect. This way I have the advantage of using a faux iPhone on the Verizon network, as well as access to the Internet wherever I had a signal. I didn’t have to worry about motels or restaurants not offering wifi for my laptop either, since I could tether my laptop to my phone instead.

As far as connections go, Verizon gets an A here. There were times when I completely lost the signal, but I was so far high up in the mountains that it was to be expected. If I had to guess, I’d say I had a signal and access to the Internet virtually 99 percent of the time. Total WIN there. It makes liveblogging or livetweeting my experiences as they happen as easy as pie. Mmmmmm, pie…

Many of the apps on my iPod relies on geolocation to work ideally, especially Google Maps, and as long as I was in New York this wasn’t a problem. It was amazingly accurate in pegging my location, despite the fact that the iPod had no GPS chip.

That is, until I wound up in Massachusetts. Then the iPod went from thinking I was in Martha’s Vineyard, to thinking I was in Seattle. :blink:

Despite being unable to track me, I could still use Google Maps manually instead of having to rely on paper maps, except that it incessantly flashed popups telling me it could not locate me, even though I was not using the geolocation feature, and I couldn’t find any way to disable it either. I already know you can’t locate me, there’s no need to tell me that a hundred times a minute. Yeesh.

The net result of all this was a ton of wrong turns, missed exits, and complete absurdity when I came across a street in Google maps that simply did not exist in real life. FAIL

So it looks like I will have to supplement my iPod with a bonafide GPS device now. The TomTom is working on an iPod dock for the future, though I don’t know how reliable it will be, and I hear Garmin is better for the USA. A speakerphone would also be a bonus, as it would negate the need to get a headset (I’ve been thinking about getting one, but the only time I would really need it is for when I’m driving.) Something to research for the future, for sure. In the meantime, if any of you use GPS devices, I could use some advice on what you think worked the best.

Other than that, the iPod was very useful for finding points of interest, though it tended to be a hit or miss thing. Some things worth checking out wouldn’t be listed, so I always had the feeling that I was missing something right under my nose. As far as locating highly rated hotels in the area, the Simultravel app I was using for that gets an F for EPIC FAIL. It only listed a fraction of the hotels within the area I was in, making the effort of locating a good place to stay for the night on the fly a monumentally hair tearing experience. I ended up going back and forth from using Google Local to surfing TripAdvisor all on my iPod’s Safari browser, and since TripAdvisor is a slow and bloated site to begin with, just trying to find a place to stay on the go proved to be more ridiculously frustrating than it should have been. It wasn’t until I stumbled upon Hotels.com’s tailored made site for the iPhone that finding a place to stay finally became more of a pleasure than a horror. It’s how I found Best Western in Ticonderoga, New York, easily the best hotel I’ve stayed at by far, and while chatting with a friend on Google Talk on lodging ideas and checking my email, I booked a reservation there while I was pulled off the road somewhere south of Burlington, Vermont, doing it all on my iPod. Technology can be truly beautiful sometimes. :wub:

As for finding points of interest and dining, I used a combination of Yelp!, Where to? and Google Local to find places worthy of checking out. It made such an impromptu vacation as mine all the more pleasurable and easier to manage.

Finally, I noticed when entering a dining establishment that the first thing I would check for was an electrical outlet to plug my laptop in. LOL My laptop’s battery gives out after only 40 minutes, so it certainly does create a handicap when I’m lugging it around. That MacBook with its 7 hour long battery life can’t come soon enough for me. :D

As far as the digital/internet side of my vacation goes, I certainly learned a few things that will better prepare me for next time. Another thing I need to get a handle on is how to manage my blogging/social media time. I noticed I spent far too much time responding to tweets and comments when I should have been driving and getting to wherever I was getting. And once the day was spent, I found myself too exhausted to blog about the day’s events while it was still fresh on my mind. Ironically, when I finally had time to recap my vacation experiences so far, I ended up blogging about my third day of vacation, rather than the first day, so my chronology was all out of sorts. I was also using BrightKite to tweet/blog my latest movements, but I only used it intermittently, and there were times when it didn’t go through at all. It made for a disjointed way of getting the crux of my vacation experiences out there for all to read, but since this is all new to me, I’m sure I’ll eventually find my mojo and liveblog my experiences in a more consistent manner. :shades:

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go light my fireplace. :whistle:



The most unplanned vacation, EVAH!

Lincoln Adams | October 12, 2009 @ 6:04 pm

So tomorrow I start a 4 state vacation tour (Connecticut, Massachusetts, Vermont, New York), and I did virtually nothing to plan for it except sketch a rough itinerary of where I might go. I don’t even know where I’ll be lodging either. :wideeyed:

And hey, guess what the forecast will be the whole time I’m up there too? Why rain, rain, and oops, lookie here, even more rain! :wall:

Sigh.

I feel pretty good about it though, until about sometime yesterday when it suddenly hit me and I panicked for a minute: “ZOMG im drvng 100s of milez n i dunno were im goin or were im stayin i dnt pln anthen at all omg omg omg im gonna die di die aahhh aiiieeee!!!111111!!”

But I’m feeling much better now. :D

It’s been three years since I’ve gone anywhere, but what makes this trip truly interesting is that it will be an opportunity to finally put my iPod Touch to the test. I have all sorts of travel apps on it to help me find hotels, points of interests, and even people within my Facebook/Twitter network who might be nearby. Since my iPod is tethered to my Verizon phone, it also puts Verizon’s network to the test as well. Will I be able to stay jacked into the Internet wherever I go, and blog/tweet about my experiences as they happen? That’s what I’m hoping for. It will be the first time that I will utterly rely on my iPod as my beacon and guide rather than paper maps and AAA tourbooks. (Although I do have an AAA app on my iPod too.) :ggrin:

One of the things I’ve wanted to do with this blog was to write about my experiences as I go out there and spontaneously experience life beyond the prison that is my home town. But I also wanted to be able to easily share it all with the two or three faithful people who read my blog as well, and now with these newfound digital tools at my disposal, it makes it all possible.

It’s funny, the last few times I went on vacation, the only way I could even check my email was to stop at the local library or internet cafe and use a guest account. I didn’t even have a cam phone, so if I saw something interesting, there was no way for me to instantaneously take a shot and upload it for others to enjoy. Even when I had a laptop, half the time the motel didn’t have free wifi, so there wasn’t much I could do with it either. But now with Verizon, I have access to the Internet virtually anywhere in the United States. It’s opened up a whole new world to me, and I can’t wait to explore it.

So tomorrow, it begins. I’ll be getting up at 4AM and from there will begin my trek north. If you want to keep track of what I’ve been doing and see the latest pics/video, just read my side posts (up in the top right corner), or follow me on Facebook/Twitter if you haven’t already. That should serve as my filler content until I have a chance to blog again. Hope you enjoy my writings as much as I hope to enjoy this trip. Assuming I survive that is. :blink:

Why yes, Gecko is in fact coming along for the ride.

Why yes, Gecko is in fact coming along for the ride.



Living without a buffer!

Lincoln Adams | June 4, 2009 @ 11:30 am

When a guy lives with his parents for so… very… agonizingly… long… he tends to take certain things for granted.

While I contributed to paying for most of the rent and bills, Mommy would always pretty much take care of the rest. All those basic necessities of life (like toilet paper) would magically replenish itself so I never had to worry about them. I never had to deal with the scum sucking landlord, or the utility bills, or even with most of the cleaning, though I still cleaned my own room and did my own laundry. Other than that (and cooking), Mommy would always take care of everything else.

I didn’t even have to worry about the phone bills until recently either because I was under the family plan. Since I started making plans to move out once my debts were paid, one of the first things I did was to break off from my parents’ family plan so I could have my own account, but of course Verizon completely botched the process by charging me for two lines when I only wanted one.

After I saw my first Verizon bill and realized the error they made, the first thing that came to my mind was, “Ah well, Mommy will take care… … … … crap.”

Yep, for the first time I had to handle my own phone bill, and after numerous phone calls, emails, and talking to maybe 5 different representatives to get things straightened out, I started to realize very quickly just how BIG a buffer my mother had been for me from life’s everyday aggravations and hassles.

Independence does come with a price after all. :D

Not that I’m completely unprepared for it, but there are some things that I was still going to have to learn about, like say, paying the electric bill, which my Momsie tried to explain to me the other day:

“If your apartment has one you should always make sure to read the meter to pay the electric, that way you’re not overpaying.”

:blink:

“Sigh.”

Ayup, it’s definitely going to be a weird experience to sit in my own apartment and wonder why the toilet paper was no longer magically replenishing itself, or why the rent wasn’t automatically being paid, or why the apartment just wouldn’t stay clean for some blasted reason, or why there was never any food in the fridge. Didn’t a group of magical elves always take care of all that? What happened to them all??!?



Apple Gives The Finger to Hearing Impaired-Deaf People Over iPhone

Lincoln Adams | September 26, 2008 @ 4:39 pm

Well it looks like the iPhone is out for me.  :(  I’ll have to look into alternatives with Verizon instead.  Why you ask?  Because Apple, in their ever so thoughtful consideration for the disabled decided to flip off those of us who were hearing impaired by designing a phone incompatible with digital hearing aids.  Thanks Apple!  :rant:

There was this whole stink about it last year too, but I would have thought by now they’d wise up to their asshattedness and produce a more compatible phone with the release of the iPhone 3G.  Nope.  I gave it a try today and immediately heard a grating buzzing sound as soon as I put my aids in telecoil (telephone) mode.  I can still hear the voice on the other end but the screeching banshee sounds as a result of electronic interference didn’t exactly make it a pleasure to use.  Beautiful.

Guess I’ll be sticking with Verizon then, at least for the time being.  I checked their list of Smartphone / PDA / Blackberries that were hearing aid compatible and found the following short list:

Blackberry Curve 8330 M4/T4
Blackberry 8703e M4/T4
Blackberry 7130e M3/T3
Blackberry Pearl 8130 M3/T3
Motorola Q9c M3/T3
Palm Treo 755p M3/T4
Palm Centro Smartphone M4/T4
Palm Treo 700wx M3
Verizon Wireless PN-820 M4
Verizon Wireless SMT 5800 M3/T3
Verizon Wireless XV6800 M3
Verizon Wireless XV6900 M3

I have no idea how any of these phones differ from the iPhone, but I’m gonna guess they all suck flaming hog balls in comparison.  :mad:  The Mx/Tx designation by the way determines how compatible they are.  Anything with the number 3 meets the compatibility standard, while any number above that exceeds the standard (in other words, 4 is better.)

Guess I’ll be doing some research today while I curse out Apple’s name.  :curse:



Help Me Become a Super Righteous Evil Stomping Blogging Badass

Lincoln Adams | September 23, 2008 @ 1:44 am

So now that the sky is falling and the world is soon coming to an end, it seems my plan to pay off all my debts couldn’t have come at a better time.  Just a few more months and I will be back in black, so to speak.  :ggrin:

And I figured, what better way to celebrate the coming of Armageddon and my soon debt free existence than to give myself a much needed and overdue makeover?  After all, if I’m gonna go out, I might as well go out in style.  :shades:

This is where you, my beloved readers come in.  I’m going to need some advice and suggestions to complete my makeover here, and your much valued advice will most certainly be welcome.

So where do we begin?  Well it begins of course, with…
 

The Leather Jacket

 
Yep, there’s not a brother in creation who can lay claim to being the baddest of the badasses if he’s not donning a slab of weather beaten leather.  And I don’t mean the kind of leather sported by a 500 pound biker either:

Oh HELL no.

Oh, HELL NO.

No, not quite.  I’m looking for a blazer type jacket that swings in the breeze as I walk in slow motion towards whatever epic battle I’m about to engage in with a gritty but determined look on my face.  Something like the following might be more appropos:

I'm kind of a big deal.

I'm kind of a big deal.

JCPenny’s never seem to have what I’m looking for though, and something like this I can’t chance ordering online because it’ll likely either be too short, too long, too tight, or too loose.  Something like this has to be perfect.  Oh, and something like this also has to have a big enough pouch to store all those women’s hearts I’ll be grabbing up when they see me looking all fine and whatnot.  So, suggestions?  Maybe an online store that will tailor make a jacket based on the measurements I give them?  Ponder over this some while I move on the the next item on my list:
 

The Watch

 
It’s kinda sad, but I haven’t been wearing a watch for years.  The last watch I wore was a titanium hunk of metal that was given to me as a graduation present from my folks after I finished college, my mother’s reasoning then being that I should have a gift that not even I could break.  She was wrong of course.  The thing gave up the ghost a few short years later, and my wrist still has that pasty white line around it where my watch used to be.  Here’s a tip by the way: just because a watch is made of titanium doesn’t mean it won’t break if you end up dropping it on the street the same day a dumpster truck passes through.

Anyway, the thing that held me back here from getting another watch was that I kind of liked my watches to be a bit.. well,  gadgetry.  You know, one that could tell me the weather, latest sports scores and what was currently showing in theaters.  So I ordered a watch from MSN Direct that looked like it had been lifted off of Dick Tracy’s dead body and thought I was once again the epitome of cool.  The watch would update with all kinds of nifty info and graphics via a radio signal.

The only problem was, I happened to be living in a dead zone 50 odd miles wide between the two areas where the watch could actually get a strong signal.  Needless to say I don’t think holding my watch out the car window as I desperately tried to balance between driving and using myself as a human antenna was quite what the designers had in mind.  Another downside was that the antenna was built into the wristband, and it was about as bendable as a block of steel.  While a lot of thought admittedly went into its design, comfort obviously wasn’t one of them.

So, what to do?  I still wanted a watch that was a bit gadgetry.  And man do they have gadgets watches aplenty.  They even have watches where you can upload videos or watch TV on as well!

Nothing says COOL like a watch that can get Rick-Rolled.

Nothing says COOL like a watch that can get Rick-Rolled.

I might be going overboard with this though, especially since I have an online buddy who is convinced beyond measure that if I even think of wearing a monstrosity such as the video watch above, I will never get a girl, never, ever, ever, ever, amen and amen, for the love of all that is good and holy, please, do not sully the human race by wearing such a ridiculous contraption.

Well alrighty then.  :ggrin:

That still leaves the question of what brand and type I should get though.  Obviously I want a good, quality watch that will last, maybe solar powered, small and not bulky, black leather wrap, (to match my black leather jacket of course) built in compass, (I’m constantly getting lost so this is a must), and since I can’t get weather reports, I figure one that can read barometer levels would be a nice alternative instead.  Oh, and it has to light up.  I don’t mean the fuzzy wuzzy neon glow in the dark silliness either, I mean light up nice and bright so that a plane flying overhead could see it.  Seriously, I’m fed up with not being able read my watch because I’m running from the police and the dumpster I’m hiding in makes it too dark for me to tell the time.  It’s just uncivilized.

So, suggestions? :D   Moving on along in the meantime:
 

The Sunglasses

 
There arew few things in life I’m more finicky about choosing than sunglasses. They’re always too round, too ugly, too rickety, too bulky or too much or too little of some damned thing that I just end up hating it after a while.

With sunglasses this awesome, how could you not want me?

With sunglasses this awesome, how could you not want me?

Bottom line though, the glasses have to be polarized.  When you can see clouds the way God probably sees them, then dude, those are the kind of glasses I want.  Only problem is, polarizing sunglasses are rarely mirrored or opaque enough so you can’t see the eyes.  And that just won’t do, especially when I’m checking out a super hot awesome babelicious babe’s umm… shoes.   It’s none of people’s business what I’m looking at anyway.  :whistle:

I did see one brand that had polarized but completely opaque (none of that ugly brownish tint) at a Mall once, but I never got the name.  Once again, suggestions on brands I could check out are welcome.  :shades:
 

The Cellphone

 
I’m with Verizon, which as some of you Verizon users know likes to nickel and dime every bloody damned thing you do on your phone including using the built-in calculator.   Seriously, this is the one network where if you utilized every possible feature they offered you’d probably pay oh, about a grand a month or so for the pleasure.  And just to milk it further, let’s not pay a one time fee to download, say a ringtone.  Let’s offer a SUBSCRIPTION FEE instead where you have to subscribe to a ringtone you like on a $%^&ing monthly basis.  Dude, seriously.  Not cool.

And since I’m using a basic LG phone, it takes me about 10 minutes to dial in complete sentence when texting someone (including Twitter).  I could go Blackberry I guess, but let’s face it, we all know there’s only one solution here:

My hands are manlier.

My hands are manlier.

I’ll have to jump ship and go with AT&T though, and from what I understand of their monthly plans, the costs can get steep ($80 or so for the whole works including unlimited text).   But a coworker let me try out the iPhone just for a minute and it was enough for me to fall in love.  :love:  Yep, I definitely wantie, especially when all the favorite apps I use have also been ported for the iPhone.  Heck even my webstats service ported an app for the iPhone.  Mobile blogging and twittering would get a whole lot more fun with an iPhone too, especially if I get caught in a Cat 5 hurricane and want to live blog the experience while sharp debris fly around me.

So for those of you who jumped from your former network to AT&T, was it a real pain?  I was told I can still keep my phone number from Verizon, but I’ll have to find out for sure.  One thing’s certain, I just can’t be a true badass now if I’m not carrying an iPhone. :D
 

The MacBook

 
Villains use Windows.  The good guys use Macs.  There’s a reason for this, so who am I to break with tradition?  Besides, I need a machine that removes as many roadblocks as humanly possible between creating multimedia content and uploading it to my blog.  Do I wanna make a video?  Click click, done.  Do I want to create a podcast so y’all can swoon at the sound of my stud sounding voice?  Click click, done.  Photos, Music Composition?  No problem.  They really do make it that simple, at least from what I could tell when I played around with a MacBook for about two hours at Best Buy until they threw me out.  Microsoft?  I don’t know what these people are smoking, but Vista acts more like a virus sent by the Russians than an operating system.  Seriously, how hard can it be to make something as user intuitive and fun to play with like GarageBand?  I’d like to compose some bit of music and videos one of these days, but Microsoft, they like to leave that sort of thing up to third party developers who charge you $500 for the pleasure of installing their bloated craptastic software onto your system, which then proceeds to chew up your memory into bits, cause your hard drive to forget how to spin again and your video card to go blind from insanity.

When I say I want a pimped out notebook, this is not what I meant.

When I say I want a pimped out notebook, this is not what I mean.

So, it’s settled that a MacBook is a must, especially if I’m going to be traveling a lot and living in dinky (but yet homely) apartments.  I’d love to get one secondhand, but from a cursory look on eBay they’re so high priced even secondhand that I’m probably better off getting it new.  Sad thing, this will probably be my biggest investment, and it’s not one I’m ready to make unless my blog earnings justify it.  So how can you guys help?  Well if you got one lying around, feel free to donate it to the brutha here.  It’s for a good cause.  Or, you could  link to my blog.  No, really.  Adding a link from your site can really do a lot to boost my standings in the search engines, and in return I’ll be happy to link you back.  Lincoln needs some link love, sugar.  :D

And finally:
 

The Motorbike

 
Yeah, you knew this was coming.  A badass without a bike?  It’s like Mozart without a piano.  Although, I might make an exception here only because I simply don’t know how the hell I’m supposed to go trudging around the country with both a SUV and a bike.  I could get a trailer I guess, but that tends to overly complicate things more than it should.  I already got a sweet ride, so is a bike really necessary?

Well yes.

It’s kinda like skydiving or bungee jumping, one of those things you do once in your lifetime, just to see what it’s like, at which point if you’ve managed to survive the experience you can then go around boasting about what a reckless badass you’ve been (though this is probably something I wouldn’t want my mother to know about.)

Plus, the chicks dig it, which is pretty much the only reason I’d think of getting one (and yet another reason why Mom is better off not knowing.)

Yes, I really am THIS awesome.

Yes, I really am THIS awesome.

There’s crazy though, and then there’s suicidal.  While I’m down with crazy, I definitely wouldn’t get a bike with enough CCs that I could outrace an F-16 fighter jet.  A simple beginner’s bike with 250CCs will suit me just fine, thank you.  Bike enthusiasts will laugh at me, but most people won’t know the difference.  And besides, the chicks dig it.  Though truth be told, I really dug the Harley Fatboy that was used in the movie Terminator 2.  How cool would it be to have a bike you can effortlessly latch an oversized shotgun onto?

Get off my bike, Arnie.

Get off my bike, Arnie.

Ok, on second thought, that might be just a bit too much (especially since the bike model Arnie rode on still retails for like $15,000 today.)

No, I think something a bit more sensible might be in order, such as the Kawasaki Ninja 250, which is touted as a great beginner’s bike and only retails for $3,000 or so.  Best thing about it of course is that it seats two.  :naughty:

In case you haven't noticed by now, black is my thing.

In case you haven't noticed by now, black is my thing.

On the off chance that anyone reading this is a bike enthusiast, happy to hear if you have any thoughts to add.  :ggrin:
 

Conclusion

 
That about wraps up all the ingredients needed to realize my lifelong dream of becoming a Super Righteous World Saving Badass.  Ahhh, I could see it now too: waltzing into a Dairy Queen somewhere in Smalltown, USA, taking my helmet off to reveal my studly, tousled, raven black hair, and ordering up the kind of drink only badasses would dare to order:

“Give me a milk…  CHOCOLATE.

Dudes, who wouldn’t want me?  :ggrin:



Wanna know why I hate my job?

Lincoln Adams | May 20, 2008 @ 3:48 pm

Here’s how a typical day might go:

*Phone Rings*

“Special Division, Lincoln Adams speaking.”

“Yeah I need to have a few documents faxed over?”

“Sure, what’s the subject’s last name, first name?”

I get up, pull the requested files out of the drawer, and then fax them over.

*Phone Rings*

“Special Division, Lincoln Adams speaking.”

“Yeah I need to have a few documents faxed over?”

“Sure, what’s the subject’s last name, first name?”

I get up, pull the requested files out of the drawer, and then fax them over.

*Phone Rings*

“Special Division, Lincoln Adams speaking.”

“Yeah I need to have a few documents faxed over?”

“Sure, what’s the subject’s last name, first name?”

I get up, pull the requested files out of the drawer, and then fax them over.

*Phone Rings*

“Special Division, Lincoln Adams speaking.”

“Yeah I need to have a few documents faxed over?”

“Sure, what’s the subject’s last name, first name?”

I get up, pull the requested files out of the drawer, and then fax them over.

*Phone Rings*

“Dominos Pizza.”

“Oh…. sorry I must have dialed the wrong number. *click*

*Phone Rings*

“LavaLife Dating Service, how can I help you?”

“……………………………… *click*

*Phone Rings*

“Central Intelligence Agency, Jack Ryan speaking.”

“Linc stop #$%ing around with the phone.”

“Oops, sorry sir, I won’t do it ag-”

*click*


I need a new job.