Panera Bread | The Habitation of Justice

How I got snowed by an old lady

Lincoln Adams | October 31, 2009 @ 12:42 pm

So I was in Panera Bread last night, relaxing and enjoying a bagel sandwich (that I brought from a real bagel shop), when a nice old lady approached me and began to sign in ASL. She had seen that I was hard of hearing and wanted to know if I signed too. Since I had normal hearing otherwise I told her no, but that I’d like to learn it some day (particularly with a smoking hot deaf biddy willing to sign very naughty things to me, but I omitted that part.)

We had a nice conversation, and she turned out to be of normal hearing. It was actually her 18 year old daughter who was deaf, and since her daughter had also seen me as I entered the cafe, I guess they must have been curious about me.

So the lady tells me she has a few free DVDs in her car that were educational videos for those who were deaf, but wanted to learn more about the Bible. In addition to using closed captioning, all the characters would sign in ASL too. I thought it was pretty cool, and I was happy to meet someone who was a Christian, and better yet, someone who would truly understand what it’s like to live with a hearing loss.

She went to her car, came back and gave me the DVDs in a brown bag, then asked me if I was interested in getting a few more to pass around to any deaf friends I might have too, she’d be happy to send them to me by mail. We chatted for a bit more, and then she left.

The DVDs were completely innocuous looking, like something you might find at a typical Christian bookstore. Then I happened to look at the very fine print to see who published the materials. “Watchtower Society.” :wideeyed: Jehovah’s Witnesses?!?! Oh no! No, no, no, nononononononono!! :wall:

I had just given a JW my mailing address, and unwittingly invited an army of religious salesmen to my doorstep to give me no end of grief. God only knows what I’m gonna get in the mail now too. All because I had let down my guard just a little bit because of a sense of camaraderie I had with a sweet old lady. Why, why, WHY do I slip up like this? GAH!!

Sigh, I guess I’ll need to wire my doorbell with a few thousand volts of electricity today. Just in case.

Tags: bible, camaraderie, christian, conversation, cult, deaf, educational videos, hearing, hearing loss, jehovah witnesses, panera bread, Watchtower Society
Categories: Christians Gone Wild

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Ranting at Panera Bread

Lincoln Adams | September 21, 2008 @ 7:14 pm

Well I’m at Panera Bread, thinking that by having an nice Panini sandwich and watching the bustling of people around me, it would put me in a mellow enough mood to blog something up.

All I’m seeing now though is a bunch of ugly looking people who bother me just by being ugly, couples who bother me because they’re couples and have to make a point of showing the whole world that they’re couples (hold on while I go outside to let the air of the tires of said couple’s car… yeah, let’s see how manly you are now for having a girlfriend when you have to call AAA. Ha-Ha!)

Then there’s the schmuckaroos that stare at me like I just landed from Mars. Yes I have a laptop, which means I probably have more money than you. Yes, I’m by myself, which just means I was smart enough to stay single. What the f__ is it to you? Staring is rude, so knock it off before I decide to cram that Asiago Roast Beef sandwich you’re sucking on down your douche hole.

I know some people might interpret my behavior here as being antisocial, but that’s not true. I just hate people, is all. They’re rude, obnoxious, mean, and they smell bad. In other words, they remind me of me.