True story: Guy goes online looking for love, only problem is he’s a 46 year old pretending to be 18. He meets the love of his life, an impressionable 18 year old girl who eventually finds out the man of her dreams is a wee bit older than he let on. Depressed and distraught, she runs into the online arms of a 22 year old stud. Finding this to be a rather unacceptable situation, the guy does the only logical thing he can think of: he grabs up his trusty old rifle, hunts down the 22 year old stud and blows him away.

But there’s another problem: the 18 year old girl of his dreams was also a wee bit older than she let on. As in, she was a 45 years old wife and mother of two kids. Whoops.

By the way, the guy was a church deacon.

I swear people, it’s not like I actually go looking for these stories to show that church people are seriously WHACKED (it was an old news item that showed up in my inbox today). Given my recent string of church bashing though, the timing did seem a little odd. But then again for a guy like me that’s par for the course. Welcome to my weird life, folks.