I’m on the last leg of my vacation trip, and finally have some time to sit down and reflect on my experiences so far, especially when it comes to blogging about it all.

Rather than use an iPhone (which are not hearing aid compatible and relies on the crappy AT&T network), I went with the next best thing, an iPod Touch that I tether to my PDA Phone using Verizon’s Broadband Connect. This way I have the advantage of using a faux iPhone on the Verizon network, as well as access to the Internet wherever I had a signal. I didn’t have to worry about motels or restaurants not offering wifi for my laptop either, since I could tether my laptop to my phone instead.

As far as connections go, Verizon gets an A here. There were times when I completely lost the signal, but I was so far high up in the mountains that it was to be expected. If I had to guess, I’d say I had a signal and access to the Internet virtually 99 percent of the time. Total WIN there. It makes liveblogging or livetweeting my experiences as they happen as easy as pie. Mmmmmm, pie…

Many of the apps on my iPod relies on geolocation to work ideally, especially Google Maps, and as long as I was in New York this wasn’t a problem. It was amazingly accurate in pegging my location, despite the fact that the iPod had no GPS chip.

That is, until I wound up in Massachusetts. Then the iPod went from thinking I was in Martha’s Vineyard, to thinking I was in Seattle.

Despite being unable to track me, I could still use Google Maps manually instead of having to rely on paper maps, except that it incessantly flashed popups telling me it could not locate me, even though I was not using the geolocation feature, and I couldn’t find any way to disable it either. I already know you can’t locate me, there’s no need to tell me that a hundred times a minute. Yeesh.

The net result of all this was a ton of wrong turns, missed exits, and complete absurdity when I came across a street in Google maps that simply did not exist in real life. FAIL

So it looks like I will have to supplement my iPod with a bonafide GPS device now. The TomTom is working on an iPod dock for the future, though I don’t know how reliable it will be, and I hear Garmin is better for the USA. A speakerphone would also be a bonus, as it would negate the need to get a headset (I’ve been thinking about getting one, but the only time I would really need it is for when I’m driving.) Something to research for the future, for sure. In the meantime, if any of you use GPS devices, I could use some advice on what you think worked the best.

Other than that, the iPod was very useful for finding points of interest, though it tended to be a hit or miss thing. Some things worth checking out wouldn’t be listed, so I always had the feeling that I was missing something right under my nose. As far as locating highly rated hotels in the area, the Simultravel app I was using for that gets an F for EPIC FAIL. It only listed a fraction of the hotels within the area I was in, making the effort of locating a good place to stay for the night on the fly a monumentally hair tearing experience. I ended up going back and forth from using Google Local to surfing TripAdvisor all on my iPod’s Safari browser, and since TripAdvisor is a slow and bloated site to begin with, just trying to find a place to stay on the go proved to be more ridiculously frustrating than it should have been. It wasn’t until I stumbled upon Hotels.com’s tailored made site for the iPhone that finding a place to stay finally became more of a pleasure than a horror. It’s how I found Best Western in Ticonderoga, New York, easily the best hotel I’ve stayed at by far, and while chatting with a friend on Google Talk on lodging ideas and checking my email, I booked a reservation there while I was pulled off the road somewhere south of Burlington, Vermont, doing it all on my iPod. Technology can be truly beautiful sometimes.

As for finding points of interest and dining, I used a combination of Yelp!, Where to? and Google Local to find places worthy of checking out. It made such an impromptu vacation as mine all the more pleasurable and easier to manage.

Finally, I noticed when entering a dining establishment that the first thing I would check for was an electrical outlet to plug my laptop in. LOL My laptop’s battery gives out after only 40 minutes, so it certainly does create a handicap when I’m lugging it around. That MacBook with its 7 hour long battery life can’t come soon enough for me.

As far as the digital/internet side of my vacation goes, I certainly learned a few things that will better prepare me for next time. Another thing I need to get a handle on is how to manage my blogging/social media time. I noticed I spent far too much time responding to tweets and comments when I should have been driving and getting to wherever I was getting. And once the day was spent, I found myself too exhausted to blog about the day’s events while it was still fresh on my mind. Ironically, when I finally had time to recap my vacation experiences so far, I ended up blogging about my third day of vacation, rather than the first day, so my chronology was all out of sorts. I was also using BrightKite to tweet/blog my latest movements, but I only used it intermittently, and there were times when it didn’t go through at all. It made for a disjointed way of getting the crux of my vacation experiences out there for all to read, but since this is all new to me, I’m sure I’ll eventually find my mojo and liveblog my experiences in a more consistent manner.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go light my fireplace.

Tags: battery, blogging, browser, driving, experiences, geolocation, google, google maps, gps, hotels, internet, iphone, ipod touch, laptop, new york, PDA, phone, social media, technology, travel, tweet, vacation, verizon, wifi
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So tomorrow I start a 4 state vacation tour (Connecticut, Massachusetts, Vermont, New York), and I did virtually nothing to plan for it except sketch a rough itinerary of where I might go. I don’t even know where I’ll be lodging either.

And hey, guess what the forecast will be the whole time I’m up there too? Why rain, rain, and oops, lookie here, even more rain!

Sigh.

I feel pretty good about it though, until about sometime yesterday when it suddenly hit me and I panicked for a minute: “ZOMG im drvng 100s of milez n i dunno were im goin or were im stayin i dnt pln anthen at all omg omg omg im gonna die di die aahhh aiiieeee!!!111111!!”

But I’m feeling much better now.

It’s been three years since I’ve gone anywhere, but what makes this trip truly interesting is that it will be an opportunity to finally put my iPod Touch to the test. I have all sorts of travel apps on it to help me find hotels, points of interests, and even people within my Facebook/Twitter network who might be nearby. Since my iPod is tethered to my Verizon phone, it also puts Verizon’s network to the test as well. Will I be able to stay jacked into the Internet wherever I go, and blog/tweet about my experiences as they happen? That’s what I’m hoping for. It will be the first time that I will utterly rely on my iPod as my beacon and guide rather than paper maps and AAA tourbooks. (Although I do have an AAA app on my iPod too.)

One of the things I’ve wanted to do with this blog was to write about my experiences as I go out there and spontaneously experience life beyond the prison that is my home town. But I also wanted to be able to easily share it all with the two or three faithful people who read my blog as well, and now with these newfound digital tools at my disposal, it makes it all possible.

It’s funny, the last few times I went on vacation, the only way I could even check my email was to stop at the local library or internet cafe and use a guest account. I didn’t even have a cam phone, so if I saw something interesting, there was no way for me to instantaneously take a shot and upload it for others to enjoy. Even when I had a laptop, half the time the motel didn’t have free wifi, so there wasn’t much I could do with it either. But now with Verizon, I have access to the Internet virtually anywhere in the United States. It’s opened up a whole new world to me, and I can’t wait to explore it.

So tomorrow, it begins. I’ll be getting up at 4AM and from there will begin my trek north. If you want to keep track of what I’ve been doing and see the latest pics/video, just read my side posts (up in the top right corner), or follow me on Facebook/Twitter if you haven’t already. That should serve as my filler content until I have a chance to blog again. Hope you enjoy my writings as much as I hope to enjoy this trip. Assuming I survive that is.

Why yes, Gecko is in fact coming along for the ride.

Tags: Connecticut, experiences, internet, ipod touch, itinerary, laptop, Massachusetts, new york, phone, travel, trek, vacation, verizon, Vermont, writing
Categories: Lincoln's Personal Log
 
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So how’d you spend your weekend Linc? I’m glad you asked me that!

Let’s start with Day 1:

My state FINALLY allows us to get our defensive driving certificate online rather than put up with the agony of attending a 6 hour course with a bunch of other dweeb nozzles looking to reduce their insurance costs, or because they drove through 5 red lights on their way to OTB while kicking back a Bud Light like the real men of genius that they are. The worst thing about these “courses” is the instructor telling us with a straight face what a traffic signal does, and that red actually does mean you have to stop. Oh, and of course the ever so popular “Let’s all go around the room and introduce ourselves and explain why we’re there” routine. I hate that crap. Just give me my toilet paper of a defensive driving certificate and let me be on my way, please.

I found the cheapest internet course and immediately signed up, only to realize yet again why New York continues to suck dangling donkey balls. Because you see, I’m required to do 6 hours, whether it’s online or offline, and the presentation I have to do is timed so you can’t fast forward to get to the end and do a quiz or whatnot to finish the course. Either way, I still have to waste 6 hours of my life. And just to make sure I’m not AWOL and swapping with a buddy while the presentation moves along, popup messages randomly appear that demands you call an 800 number and repeat a series of numbers which they use for voice identification purposes so they know you’re still you. All this to save $10 a month on my insurance? Yeah, I won’t be doing this again.

So that was Day 1. Enter Day 2:

I took a nice drive around and eventually found a roadside diner that had free wifi, so I dropped in and broke out my laptop while chowing down on a Texan grilled cheese sammich. The atmosphere was nice, you could see the sunset in the distance, and I’m feeling pretty good about things. My laptop boots up and…

Blue Screen of Death.

I spent the next 30 minutes rebooting and ultimately failing to log into Windows, and dreading the thought that my laptop of almost 6 years had finally bit it. I needed it to last just a few more months too until I could replace it with a MacBook Pro.

I wasn’t ready to toss in the towel just yet, so when I got home I went to work on it. I was still able to boot into safe mode, so I tried disabling drivers and a few other tricks, all to no avail. Finally I decided to look at what’s called a dump file for clues as to what caused the crash. A dump file gets created when you log back onto Windows after your PC flashes the blue screen of death on you. I found it but couldn’t even read it, so I started googling for more info. Apparently I needed a debugging tool to analyze it, so I downloaded it, clicked the file to install, and…

“The system administrator has set policies to prevent this installation.”

This, despite the fact that I WAS the @#$%ing system administrator, and was logged in as such. I tried to install it again. No dice. So I googled some more, and tried a few registry hacks to make it stop giving me that message, and of course none of them worked. So I switched gears and installed the debugging tool on my desktop instead, then used my thumbdrive to download the dump file and upload it to my desktop.

Now it came to learning how to actually use this tool. I had no idea what to do with it, so I googled some more, and finally came across a series of instructions to help me weed out the relevant info from the dump file. It goes like this:

1. Open a command prompt (Start -> Run -> “cmd”)
2. cd \program files\debugging tools (Or wherever they are installed to)
3. kd -z C:\WINDOWS\Minidump\Mini???????-??.dmp
4. kd> .logopen c:\debuglog.txt
5. kd> .sympath srv*c:\symbols*http://msdl.microsoft.com/download/symbols
6. kd> .reload;!analyze -v;r;kv;lmnt;.logclose;q
7. You now have a debuglog.txt in c:\, open it in a text edit (Notepad?).

I don’t think landing the Space Shuttle could be this complicated. Nevertheless, I followed the instructions carefully and was finally able to nail down the file name that my laptop choked on, a file called vsdatant.sys. I googled it and it was a file that belonged to ZoneAlarm, a firewall software that I had running on my system, though I hadn’t updated it in a while. So I uninstalled it, rebooted, and Windows finally came back up again!

Yaaaaaaaaaaaay, I had saved my lappie-top!!!

I immediately started updating all my software, installed Service Pack 3 for WinXP, and rebooted several times to make sure the problem was truly gone. By this time it was after 4AM, so I patted myself on the back for a job well done, and went to bed. Woke up the next morning, feeling refreshed and happy, then booted up my laptop.

Blue Screen of Death.

At this point I’m pretty convinced now it’s hardware related, most likely the memory. In one desperate last move, I raced down to the computer store to buy the only memory they had in stock compatible with my laptop, then raced back to swap my memory. I was pretty sure this would do it. It had to be the memory, right? It’s the only way my poor lappie could still be saved.

Blue Screen of Death.

Sigh. I finally thought, @#$% it, and formatted the drive. I nuked everything and installed WinXP completely from scratch, and that my friends, is what finally resolved the issue. I only had to lose everything that was on my laptop to get it done too, though fortunately, I had copies of all my files on my desktop as well, so no big loss. But thank you so much, Microsoft, for designing the most cryptically ridiculous non-intuitive OS in creation. May you all rot in San Francisco.

I couldn’t stay mad though, I was happy enough to get my laptop back and running even better than before. I was planning to go on vacation next month and I would have felt naked not having it with me so I could blog on the road.

After the laptop saga finally ended, I ran some errands and came back home late in the evening, satisfied in the knowledge that despite the fact that I got no rest whatsoever, I did get a lot accomplished. I get my mail and my happy karma is ruined once again by a disturbing letter that will be the subject of my next blog post. Nothing alarming really, just a quick note to let me know my personal info and social security number had been stolen and that I would imminently become a victim of identity theft and fraud. No biggie.

So how was your weekend?

Tags: blue screen of death, crash, defensive driving, googling, identity theft, internet, internet course, laptop, mail, Microsoft
Categories: Lincoln's Personal Log
 
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With all the news about the economy being in the toilet and people left and right losing their jobs (and unable to find new ones), I’m reminded of the personal recession I once experienced shortly after I graduated college, waaaaaay back in ‘98.

I had just wrapped up my undergraduate “career” and finished with a degree in computer science, all during a time when the IT industry was BOOM-ING, BABY, OW! You couldn’t so much as turn without smacking right into an IT/computer related job. I had made the right choice for a degree, patted my back for a job well done, and at 21 years of age I was ready to take on the world and start on my way to becoming a buff, studly FBI hacker who would single-handedly capture Russian bad dudes with nary a few taps on the keyboard. The world was my oyster, baby!

Well…

One job interview went by. Then another. Then another, and yet no one got back to me. Soon I started getting rejection letters, and it wasn’t long before my post-college bravado gave way to concern, and then outright fear. I was going to job fairs, handing out resumes like candy, responding to newspaper ads, emailing companies, literally knocking door to door, and all I was beginning to show for it was a growing stack of rejection letters (which I still have by the way.)

What was I doing wrong? The industry was booming, I had picked the right field, the demand was high, and yet no one wanted to hire me?

One month became two, then six, then before I knew it a whole year had gone by and I was still gainfully unemployed. My relationship with my parents was really taking a turn for the worse too. At some point things got so bad between us that they eventually became convinced that I wasn’t serious about finding work, that the only thing I was really doing all day was playing games on the internet. So as punishment they took my speedy 28.8 dialup modem away.

There’s probably nothing more demoralizing to a 22 year old college graduate than to have not only his modem taken away, but access to a car as well (since my parents both worked during the day.) So there I was, with no access to the internet and no access to a car, and yet I was still expected to somehow find a job.

Their suspicion that I would only spend the day playing Battlezone 2 or surfing Usenet groups to argue with stupid Christians was totally unfounded too. Ok… MOSTLY unfounded. It said nothing of the fact that I was desperate, DESPERATE to get the holy FRICK away from my parents and get my own place so I could live my own life. You think they’d understand that ALONE was more than enough incentive for me. I wasn’t gaming all day long on the internet. I was trying to network, research and brainstorm ways I could find a job. Then when I needed a break, I’d play a round or two of Wolfenstein. What else could I do, really?

But still they locked up my 28.8 dialup modem in their bedroom before leaving for work every day, and my only means of transportation then was a 20 year old woman’s bicycle (with a flowery basket in front) that we kept on the porch. Thank God YouTubers weren’t around then to capture the comical display of me riding around in a suit on a girlie bike with a stack of resumes crammed in my basket. I never would have lived it down.

Most of the time when I wasn’t out riding into town and feeling really stupid about myself, I was left to twiddle my thumbs while I stared blankly at the wall, wondering why God hated me so much.

I think the first low point then was when I managed to get a part time job delivering flowers, only to get fired a week later when I asked to come in later than usual so I could go to a job interview. When they realized I had graduated college and was spending time going to interviews they figured I wouldn’t be around long term and fired me. My parents blamed me for it because I shouldn’t have said anything about a job interview, but I wasn’t street smart enough to know about these things. Their harsh criticism and the embarrassment of being fired from a florist delivery job made me hate myself more than anything. I thought I was the most worthless idiot on the planet. Everyone else was landing jobs left and right and here I couldn’t even hold on to flowers.

Eventually after some more time passed, I had an idea. My modem was still being locked away safe and sound in their bedroom, but one evening I had to go to the supermarket to get some groceries for my parents and borrowed the car. When I went to get the keys, I realized one of them was the key to the bedroom.

Hmmmmm….

I had a bunch of extra quarters saved up in a can somewhere, so I grabbed those up, got in the car and stopped by the hardware store.

“Yeah I’d like to get an extra copy of this key?”

“Sure, be a few minutes.”

I watched him as he forged a magical key that would unlock the mysteries of the kingdom. I dropped a bunch of quarters on the counter while he threw a quizzical look at me, as if to say “Are you so cheap you can’t even pay in bills?” but thankfully took them anyway and gave me change.

YES!

The next morning I cheerfully waved my parents off as they went to work, then waited a few minutes to make sure neither of them came back in case they had forgotten something, and raced to their bedroom door.

*click*

You could hear the angels singing as I unlocked the door and the light from outside shone into the room. I started looking around and quickly found my beloved dialup modem. I was in the game again!

The thrill of sneaking around like that breathed some new life into me, and I would spend the next few weeks making the rounds of unlocking the bedroom door, grabbing my modem and then going through my daily routine of job hunting, networking and whatnot before I ended with a fast game of Battlezone, then quickly returning the modem back into the bedroom and locking the door again when the timer I set for myself buzzed, signaling the time I needed to get off so I wouldn’t get caught redhanded.

Once my internet time was up, I would break out the Ragu pizza sauce I kept hidden in my room and use the bread machine we had to make pizza. We had the same equipment restaurants used to make brick oven pizza, and with it all I was turning pizza-making into an art form, even learning how to toss it up to spread the dough. It was truly my source of comfort and joy. I would take a few hot slices, head over into the living room and watch General Hospital so I could catch a glimpse of my dream girl at the time, Rebecca Herbst. The fantasies of getting snuggly wubsy woos from her and the exquisite tastes of my homemade pizza helped get me through some very dark times then.

You could have had my pizza anytime, baby....

I’m not sure if my parents ever figured out I had been able to get into their bedroom, but they must have been suspicious. One day when I was going through the usual morning routine of unlocking their bedroom, I stepped in and suddenly saw an empty seltzer bottle rolling around on the floor.

Hmmmmmmm… where did that come from?

When I picked it up and tried to get a read on where it had been before, I realized it must have been right behind the door. There was no way to avoid knocking it down when you opened the door either, and that’s when it occurred to me that it was placed that way on purpose. My parents had set up a primitive boobytrap to see if I was indeed invading their bedroom while they were away at work. If it hadn’t rolled around in my view the way it did, I might have never noticed it, and it would have made for a very awkward conversation that day.

Ah well.

I took the bottle and placed it upright again behind the door before leaving and locking the room.

And so it went, week after week, unlocking their bedroom, knocking the bottle down, and then putting the modem back and setting the bottle upright just before I locked the room up again. I felt like James Bond. Fitting that they would use an empty bottle for this too. They always did see the glass half empty. *sound of corny 007 music playing*

I think after a while my parents finally started to mellow out and realize I was indeed going through a hard time here. After about 18 months of job searching, I hit my lowest point when I was even turned down for a job as a cashier, but not before enduring three humiliating interviews where they put me through a psych test, a counting test, and a few other tests to determine my knowledge of all things cashier related. I got the rejection letter 2 weeks later.

That last rejection had me throwing up my hands in defeat and ready to jump off a bridge somewhere, but shortly afterwards a recruiter found one of my resumes in a databank, at long last leading me to my first full time job, 19 months after I graduated college. Finally, my recession had come to an end.

Of course I would soon be laid off 5 months later, but that’s another story.

Tags: car, career, college, computer, economy, graduate, internet, job, jobs, life, networking, parents, part time, pizza, recession, rejection, work
Categories: Lincoln's Personal Log
 
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I recently caught this article on the BBC:

People’s health could be harmed by social networking sites because they reduce levels of face-to-face contact, an expert claims.

A lack of “real” social networking, involving personal interaction, may have biological effects, he suggests.

He also says that evidence suggests that a lack of face-to-face networking could alter the way genes work, upset immune responses, hormone levels, the function of arteries, and influence mental performance.

This, he claims, could increase the risk of health problems as serious as cancer, strokes, heart disease, and dementia.

“One of the most pronounced changes in the daily habits of British citizens is a reduction in the number of minutes per day that they interact with another human being,” he said.

“In less than two decades, the number of people saying there is no-one with whom they discuss important matters nearly tripled.”

Could be sensationalism sparked by psychologists looking for a little time in the spotlight, but in a way I agree with some of the opinions beng expressed here.

As much as I enjoy using the Internet, I find it to be a highly unsatisfying substitute for real life relationships, and if I had a choice, I would much rather meet people in person and forge relationships that way.  Yet the reason I hang out on here all the time (instead of “out there”) is because I basically have no choice.

If you’ve read the comments after the BBC article, notice how many people with disabilities defended their use of social networking, and for good reason.  The Internet takes away the bias and the barriers those of us with disabilities have to confront and deal with in real life.  In my case it’s being hard of hearing, the kind that puts me right in the gray area between those who hear normally and those who are completely deaf.  The deaf have their own culture and community, one that I can never fit into because I can still hear with the help of aids, and yet I can’t hear well enough to fit in within a society that hears normally either.  I’m caught somewhere in the middle, without a true community of my own.  As if that weren’t enough by itself, I’ve also lived the kind of unorthodox life that absolutely nobody could possibly relate to.  It’s one of the major reasons why I remain single too.

So, I go to the Internet.  Because on here, I don’t have to worry about embarrassing myself because I missed bits and pieces of a conversation.  I don’t have to worry about people forming misconceptions about me because of my disability or my background,  or assuming because I can’t hear it must also mean I’m brain damaged as well.  On the Internet, none of those things matter.

But I also see where it falls depressingly short too.  Those who use the Internet to supplement their already active social lives have no time for me.  I’m unable to bond with them and others in any meaningful way.  I can be reached via email, instant messaging, social networks and even through my blog here, and yet most of the time I find myself twiddling my thumbs, waiting for somebody, ANYBODY, to talk to me.  The hours are long and lonely in between.

And as much as I try to project the full spectrum of my personality into my writings, the Internet can only present certain bits of pieces of who I am, but never the whole.  People who know me through the Internet don’t really know me as I truly am.  Here’s a hint too:  if you find me to be a truly likable person, then you really haven’t gotten to know me at all. 

Truth be told, I find the only people I can truly relate to to via this medium are those who are forced to use it as a subsitute for real life relationships themselves.  Whether it’s because of a disability, or from living in a remote area, or from leading a solitary life that stunted their ability to network and bond with others, being online has become our only recourse to connect with other human beings.  And yet it amazes me how few there are of us, as opposed to those extroverted types who project their already successful social lives onto the Internet (and then feel the compelling need to rub it in our faces too.)  Dweebs.

And now, after having been online for so many years, I’m beginning to accept the sad conclusion that I will never find anyone I can truly bond with, a best friend who would always have time for me and vice versa, or a wonderful girl who would understand me through and through and where I’ve been.  People who totally get me.  I’m of the introverted sort who only needs one best friend and one special girl to be truly content, or perhaps those two rolled  into one.  I don’t need to have eons of acquaintances or casual friends to feel connected and feel like I belong.  But the fact that I can’t even find ONE saddens me to no end.   And I wouldn’t be surprised if all this really did adversely affect my health too just as the article claims.   Oh well.

Oh and if you’re wondering about what might cause the irrational fear of kittens, look no further than LOLcats.  I swear that mindless, idiotic internet fad is going to bring about the demise of civilization, mark my words.  I can never look at a kitten the same way again.

Tags: community, deaf, disabilities, disability, friend, friends, health, health problems, hearing, internet, life, lonely, network, online, people, personality, psychologists, relationship, single, social, social networking, social networking sites, social networks
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There were several advertising networks I used to deliver ads to my blog here, and for a while I had a pretty good setup going, to the point that with a little more traffic I could actually earn a decent secondary income, and maybe some day live off my blog altogether.  A few of them though didn’t have the option of letting me preview ads before they went live, but they did have some rudimentary filtering features (such as blocking advertisers by domain), and I figured that would be enough for me.

Until the acai berry ads started showing up.

You’ve probably seen them already, as they have infested the Internet like some sort of cyber mutated bubonic plague.   Really, Moses himself couldn’t call down a worse plague than this.  The ads lead to landing pages (vanilla websites) that contain completely fake testimonials with before and after photos that were photoshopped and/or taken from stock photo sites.  The links to the products are actually hidden affiliate links on which the affiliate marketer (or as I like to call him, the Greedy Scum Whoring Bitch Boy of Satan) receives a commission every time a visitor clicks on one of his links and subsequently makes a purchase.  What many of them don’t realize though is that the “free” acai berry offers being promoted are really a gimmick to get your credit/debit card info, at which point they charge you about $100 after two weeks without your knowledge.   By the time people figure out what’s what, the scam has already been perpetrated, and it will take much hair tearing and gnashing of teeth to get your money back again, if you can at all.  As time goes on, these landing pages are getting more and more sophisticated and will no doubt fool even more people as a result.

As if that weren’t bad enough, these are the kind of ads Greedy Scum Whoring Bitch Boy of Satan might show:

Naturally, I didn’t want these ads showing up on my blog.  I wanted only quality ads that lead to genuine products, and since these ads were nothing more than overfunded (not to mention overEXPOSED) snake oil scams, I moved to block them on the ad networks they were circulating on.

Or I should say, I TRIED to block them.  That’s when I realized just how bad this epidemic of vomit inducing flabby skin really was.  On the ValueClick network, Greedy Scum Whoring Bitch Boy of Satan constantly changed the name of his ad campaigns so even when I blocked one campaign, another one would pop up under an entirely different name.  I emailed Valueclick and complained several times about this, giving them the names of the campaigns, but of course they ignored me.  After all, I’m not the guy who’s showing them the money.  And it’s all about the money, right Valueclick?  How’s your stock doing by the way?  Jerkweeds.

Then I noticed they were also showing up on what was by far my most lucrative network: ADSDAQ (owned by ContextWeb).  Not to worry though, ADSDAQ had the option of blocking ads by domain name, so I figured no biggie, I’ll just block the domains these ads lead to, and that will be the end of it.

But then another domain popped up, and then another one, and then ANOTHER one.  And then suddenly there were ads for government grant scams, and teeth whitening scams, and ads to fake eBooks promising natural cures for various ailments, and ads for wrinkle cream scams, and on and on and on.  I literally started spending hours a day hunting down these rogue ads and adding more domains to the blacklist, and STILL they were getting through.  Just how bad was it?  Well lookie here at my latest blacklist:

acaiberryboom.com
acaiberrydetox.com
acaiberryscam.org
acaiberrytruth.org
acaicomparison.com
acaifacts.org
acaihealthreport.com
acaihealthtest.com
acaionoprah.com
adamsmoney.com
adamsmoneyblog.com
adrianasweightloss.com
adriennesweightloss.com
akabeezy.com
alanasweightloss.com
alliesdiet.com
amandasteeth.com
ameliasweightloss.com
amydiet.com
amysbrightsmile.com
amysdietcombo.com
amysincome.com
amysteeth.com
amysweightlossdiary.com
andrewsblog.grantmoneyforyou.com
annasdiet.com
annasdietingblog.com
annasdietstory.com
anndropslbs.com
annsdietsecret.com
annsweightloss.com
anthonyisgreen.com
ashleysweightloss.com
asthmadefeated.com
aubreysdietblog.com
beckylostweight.com
beckysmoneyblog.com
beckyswhiteteeth.com
becomeskinnyfast.com
benbanksit.com
bestcelebdiet.com
bestwhiteners.com
bethsmoney.com
bethsmoney.net
bethsmoney.org
billgetsmoney.com
blog.jennyswhiteteeth.com
blogfordiets.com
bradmakesitrain.com
bradsbailout.com
bradsmoney.com
bradsmoneyblog.com
briangetsmoney.com
brians-money-blog.com
briansmoneyblog.com
britneylostweight.com
buy-it-now-online.net
carlasmoney.com
cashfromgrants.info
catchhimandkeephim.com
cathysteeth.com
cellulitedefeated.com
chadgetsgreen.com
cheddahustleblog.com
cheddasblingblog.com
christiesdietsuccess.com
cindiesweightloss.com
clarasweightloss.com
colitis-cme.com
colitiscured.com
coloncleansefacts.org
conniesgrantstory.com
coreycash.com
coreyhasmoney.com
craiggetscash.com
craigsblogsite.org
dangetsgreen.com
danielgetsgreen.com
daniellasweightloss.com
danielsmoneyblog.com
darrylgotpaid.com
datingadvicesitesreviewed.info
davegetsmoney.com
davidscreditstory.com
davidsmoneyblog.com
debt-free-dave.com
debt-free-debbie.com
debtdownthedrain.com
destinysweightloss.com
dietproductsguide.com
diverticulitiscure.com
diverticulitisinstitute.com
donnasdietingblog.com
double-diet.net
downbutneverout.com
earncashfromgrants.com
elliesteeth.com
elliesweightloss.com
emergevictoriousoverfat.com
emmasdietblog.com
emmasweightlosssuccess.com
ericmakesmoney.com
erinsweightloss.com
fastgooglecash.info
fibromyalgiacured.com
flatstomachdiets.com
flatstomachrule.com
freddysblog.com
free-dieting.org
gay.com
get-money-online.com
getvitalacai.com
googlekits.com
governments-grants-2009.com
govgrantcash.com
govgrantscenter.com
grantmecash.com
grantreviewsonline.com
grantsforyounow.com
grantsreviews.org
greggetsgrants.com
healgenitalwarts.com
healthproductsanalysis.com
healthy-diet-program.com
heatherswhiteteeth.com
helensdiet.com
hemochromatosiscure.com
how-to-whiten-teeth.com
howigotwhiteteeth.com
howtolosefatfast.net
imwrinklefree.com
jackmakescash.com
3.jackmakescash.com
jackysdietblog.com
jadesteeth.com
janetsdebtblog.com
jasongetsgrants.com
jasongetspaid.com
jasongrants.com
jaygotmoney.com
jeaniesdietblog.com
jeffgetsgrants.com
jeffgetsgreen.com
jeffreysgrantblog.com
jeffsgrant.net
jeffsgrantmoney.com
jennasweightloss.com
jennasweightloss.net
jennylostweight.com
jennysathomejob.com
jennysdietblog.com
jennysdietsuccessstory.com
jensdietsecret.com
jensweightblog.com
jensweightjournal.com
jensweightlossjournal.com
jenydiet.com
jeremymadecash.com
jessicasmoney.com
jessicasmoneyblog.domlander.com
jillsbusinessblog.com
jimgetspaid.com
jimgotmoney.com
jimmygetscash.com
johngotrich.com
johnsgrantsuccess.com
johnsmoneyblog.com
jonsunemployment.com
judysweightloss.com
juliesdietblog.com
justingetsgreen.com
justinsmoneystory.com
karens-weightloss.com
karenswhiteteeth.com
karlasweightloss.com
kathylostweight.com
kaylaswhiteteeth.com
kaysdiet.com
kellygetsgreen.com
kellysdiet.com
kellysdietblog.com
kellysdietsecret.com
kellyswhiteteeth.com
kellyweightlossblog.com
kelseysweightloss.com
kevinblogsite.org
kevingetsgrants.com
kevingetsgreen.com
kevingoesgreen.com
kevingonegreen.com
kevingotcash.com
kevingotgreen.com
kevingothisgreen.com
kevinhoeffer.com
kevinsacidrefluxcure.com
kevinsbigmoneysecret.com
kevinsgotgreen.com
kevinsgrantstory.com
kevinsgreen.com
kevinsnewlife.com
kevinsrich.com
kimsdietplan.com
laurasteeth.com
lisashomebiz.com
lisaswhitesmile.com
lorigetspaid.com
lorriesweightloss.com
loseweightjen.com
makecashmonies.com
mandysdietingblog.com
mariasdietblog.com
marksgotcash.com
maryweightlossblog.com
mate1.com
mattsgrants.com
megansdietingblog.com
melissasdiet.com
melsdietblog.com
michellesweightloss.com
mikegetsmoney.com
mikemakesmoney.com
mikesgmoney.com
mikesmoneymatters.com
mollysrecipes.com
mollysweightlost.com
monasweightloss.com
monicasdietblog.com
my-money-journey.com
my-white-teeth.com
my-whitening-story.com
myacaisuccess.com
mydailyrecipes.com
mydietblogjourney.com
mygovtbailout.com
mygrantdollars.com
mygrantstory.com
mygrantstory.net
mylife.kevingoesgreen.com
myonlinedietblog.com
myowndiet.com
mysixpacks.com
myteeth.org
myweightlostdiary.info
nadiasweightloss.com
nichollesweightloss.com
nickgetspaid.com
nicksbusiness.com
nicksgreen.com
nicksmoneyblog.com
nirvanadance.com
one-flat-stomach-rule.com
onegirlsweightloss.com
onlinecashkit.com
onlinegoldfinder.com
pams-diet-blog.com
partnerwithpaul.com
patdietblog.com
paulgetspaid.com
photoshop.es0ftware.com
provedweightloss.com
rachaelraygoodies.com
rachaelsweightloss.com
rachelrayblog.com
rachelrayblogs.com
rachelraydiet.com
rachelraygoodies.com
rachelsberrydiet.com
rachelsdietadvice.com
rachelsdietguide.com
rachelsweightloss.com
rachelteethwhitening.com
rachelweightloss.com
reannesweightloss.com
refluxremedy.com
removemystretchmarks.com
reneesweightloss.com
restoremyyouth.com
richgetsrich.com
richstudent.net
rickiesweightloss.com
rickysfastcash.com
robertscashblog.com
robsgrants.com
ryan-craig.com
ryansincomestory.com
ryansmoney.com
sarahs-weightloss.com
sarahscleanteeth.com
sarahsdebtblog.com
sarahsweightloss.com
sarahswhiteteeth.com
sarasweightloss.com
sarcoidosiscure.com
sashasdietblog.com
scottsjobhunt.com
scottsmoney.com
secretofdiets.com
shingles-cure.com
singlesnet.com
sitereviewauthorities.org
sophiasweightloss.com
sophiesweightloss.com
stevesmoneyblog.com
stimulus-grants.org
tanyasdietblog.com
tanyasweightlossblog.com
teethwhiteningreviewed.com
theacaiberryresearch.net
theacaiberryresearch.org
thisdietsavedme.com
tinasdietblog.com
tomscash.com
tomsjournal.com
tomsmoney.com
tonyasdietdiary.com
top-teeth-whitening-reviews.com
top3acai.com
tourettes-disorder.com
tracysweightloss.com
true.com
trynaturesacaiberry.com
trynaturesbestacai.com
tuberculosiscured.com
tylersmoney.com
usgrantguide.org
wealthresource.org
weightlossduo.com
whitener-reviews.com
whiteningreview.com
whitenteethathome.com
winfreysweightlossblog.com
www-grants.org
jennasweightloss.net
JensWeightBlog.com
emmaweightlosssuccess.com
Realplasticsurgery.com
Cleanserate.com
secretofdiets.com
emilysdietsecrets.com
HaileysWeightLoss.com
alisasweightloss.com
8weekslose30lbs.com
rateweightlossproducts.com
tracysweightloss.com
nadiasweightloss.com
nichollesweightloss.com
melorasweightloss.com
melissasdiet.com
reneesweightloss.com
tryskinny.comericasweightloss.com
monicasdiet.com
urlsplit.com
ColonReview.com
m231g.mikegeary1.hop.clickbank.net
FatLossJournal.com
judyslbs.com
judysweightlossjourney.com
wuyiweightlosstea.org
BridgetsWeightLoss.com
myalli.com
holistichealthstudio.com
aliciasweightloss.com
2cpa.com
samarasweightloss.com
jillsnewbody.com
rachaelraygoodies.com
buy-it-now-online.net
jillsdietstory.com
aleshasdietblog.com
miraclenoodle.com
jennysdietsuccessstory.com
laurasnewbody.com
y.celebsecretdiet.com
rachaelraydiet.com
emilysweightlossblog.com
my-weight-loss-review.net
maryweightlossblog.com
sarasnewbody.com
sophiasweightloss.com
hopesdiet.come
lisasweightlossblog.com
reneesweightloss.com

And dudes, that’s only a FRACTION of all the domain names that Greedy Scum Whoring Bitch Boy of Satan had been registering, and I’m sure he adds several hundred more domains a day just to ensure his ads can never be blocked by domain filtering alone.  As if that weren’t enough, I noticed on ADSDAQ that some of the domains on the blacklist were STILL getting through.  Somehow Greedy Scum Whoring Bitch Boy of Satan had found a way to bypass the filtering system altogether by using a redirect to hide his actual domains.

Honestly,  there’s no pit in hell deep enough for this affiliate marketing terrorist.  Imagine the most heinous form of perpetual torture that could ever be inflicted on the minds and bodies of men, and multiply that by infinity times infinity, and still it’d be too good for whoever this crap sucking affiliate whoring schmuck monkey is.

I emailed ADSDAQ several times to let them know that this guy was defeating their filtering system, and they responded by simply giving me another list of domains to block, but will not do anything about the ads themselves.  Brilliant.  These networks will take money from Hitler so long as it helps them stay in business.  Nice to know you care so much about quality, eh ContextWeb?

And don’t even get me started on contextual link ads from networks like Infolinks and Kontera.  I’ve had ads for gambling, cigarette smoking, scams, ponzi schemes, (and my personal favorite: dating sites for married people) all show up after the fact on my blog, and these particular in-text networks provide NO means whatsoever for me to preview these ads and effectively block them.  Just lame and utterly absurd keyword filtering that I have to request by EMAIL, all of which can be easily defeated by a savvy spammer such as Greedy Scum Whoring Bitch Boy of Satan.

In the end, the only option I had to keep those ugly ass flabby skin ads (and all the other crap ads) off my site permanently was to drop the networks that didn’t give me full editorial control over the ads that might show up.  I had to drop three networks to accomplish this (including Chitika, which also only allows filtering by domain names), and my earning power as a result was cut by more than half.  Under these new conditions, there’s no way I can earn a decent income through my blog now.

Such a nice world we live in, where scammers can run rampant and free across so many major advertising networks, crowding out quality advertisers who actually care about their branding reputation and crippling the earning potential of publishers everywhere who likewise care about their own credibility and integrity.

So here’s to your success, Mr. Affiliate Marketing Greedy Scum Whoring Bitch Boy of Satan.  May you and all those like you someday be hit by a speeding Japanese bullet train twice over, and may all the remains of your carcasses be food for disease riddled condors.

Tags: adsdaq, advertiser, advertisers, advertising, advertising network, advertising networks, affiliate links, affiliate marketer, affiliate marketing, affiliate spammer, campaigns, chitika, domain names, domains, fake, Infolinks, internet, kontera, landing pages, plague, rant, scammer, scammers, scamming, scams, snake oil, spam, valueclick
Categories: Tangled Webs
 
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