One of the things people enjoy about my writing is my humor, so I thought I would only update my blog with humorous anecdotes that I knew would make people smile, and that approach would largely define my theme and what my site was about. The problem with that though is that I have to…
Tag Archive: humor
Allah Arrested by Infidel Police – Cocaine Markets Hardest Hit
Hmmmm…. Members of the East Central Narcotics Task Force arrested a West Hartford man was arrested after a short chase in South Windsor Thursday evening. According to police, Almighty Supremebeing Allah refused to stop for a marked cruiser and was detained about a mile down the road after the initial stop. Witnesses reportedly heard the…
Dead Men Tell No Jokes
We have a clipboard in our section that shows a list of the latest death notices for workers or workers’ relatives who recently passed away. I noticed one woman had a tendency to check the list every day when she walked by our section. She was doing it again today, so I said: “Checking to…
“Lonely Teacher Looks For Loving Pet”
Is it me, or does it seem like women are getting married at earlier and earlier ages these days? Or am I just getting older and older? I blame Christians for this (naturally), particularly those within the Bible Belt who push to get their daughters married by the time they’re 18, so by the time…
“I Have Genital Herpes…”
You know the commercial. Always when I’m eating too, this stupid ad for Valtrex comes on where some ugly schmo confesses to the world that he has genital herpes, flanked by a gorgeous girl who looks on with lovey dovey eyes and then turns to the camera to inform us that she doesn’t. “And together,…
The Naked Truth
Looking for nude, naked and bikini shots of Jessica Simpson, including photos, pics and videos? Looking for nude, naked and bikini shots of Reese Witherspoon, including photos, pics and videos? Looking for nude, naked and bikini shots of Rachael (Rachel) Ray, including photos, pics and videos? Looking for nude, naked and bikini shots of Sarah…
The Most Horrible News Ever
A dark figure approached me today, his deep voice uttering words I never wanted to hear: “Linc, Jessica Alba is back with her boyfriend, and pregnant.” “No. That’s not true. It’s impossible!” “Search your feelings. You know it to be true.” “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!”
Opened 10 trades in the stock market today, 9 of them are losing money. I... am... AWESOME. #FB
22 hours ago-
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The above map tracks my last given location.
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And by not fat you mean, what, that you're merely only 300 pounds as opposed to being 500? [More]
I am offended, what a shallow man you are Lincoln, No I'm not fat, just blond. I prefer blond men but I wouldnt call a... [More]
I hope there's a light at end of this tunnel. To vent my bitter feeling, I'm convinced that whatever I wish/want I don't get, whatever... [More]
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