Other posts related to free-spirit
When does yearning turn into dweebish neediness?
Lincoln Adams | June 3, 2009 @ 8:30 amAs I chat and connect with more and more people online (read: hot babes), there are times when I sorely miss talking to someone and I have to consciously make an effort not to barrage them with IMs, emails, texts, phone calls and whatnot just to get some attention.
I guess it’s normal for me to yearn for female companionship and friendship, but I wonder at what point it gets to be too much. I’m always groping in the dark trying to gauge whether it’s ok to reach out to someone, or whether I’m just being a pest. Women though (at least from what I’ve seen so far) seem to be like total camels here. I mean sheesh, if I didn’t reach out to them every now just to remind them that I’m still alive I’d be lucky if I ever heard from them again. I know a lot of people lead very busy lives, so I do take that into consideration, but it sucks the sucky suck when I’m left to sit here by myself twiddling my thumbs because there’s no one sane enough to talk to. Why am I always the yearner but never the yearnee? Or is it simply because I am a weenie-ish little poopiehead who is just not yearn-worthy enough for the wimmins? 
Women have created some very strange criteria in this regard too. On one hand they want a guy who’s independent and doesn’t need a woman to be happy, but then they get upset when said guy never calls them precisely BECAUSE he is in fact an independent brutha who doesn’t need a woman to be happy. If he doesn’t need a girl’s company, then chances are he’s not going to yearn for her either.
But then there’s the other extreme. I have a dear lady friend who seems to be surrounded by guys that bring neediness to levels I didn’t think were even possible. I thought I was bad? Holy crap. There’s one guy that texts, IMs, tweets and calls this poor woman every fricking minute of every fricking day, all day long, nonstop. And then another that does the same, only when he doesn’t get a response within 5 minutes he completely FLIPS THE %$^ OUT, getting all huffy and mad and bent out of shape because she didn’t INSTANTLY return his messages.
Seeing that crap does help me understand why women want a guy to be a bit more… free spirited, but that can be just as bad too. Do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t give you a second thought for weeks at a time? I sure don’t. There has to be a balance somewhere, and it makes me wonder what exactly started this mess. Have men always been clingy balls of mush, or did we start getting this way because our women have gotten more and more aloof and cold-hearted with each passing generation? Or have women become more aloof because they can’t deal with men’s growing insecurity?
Really, why can’t people yearn for each other in a normal way without overdoing it? Is that even possible anymore? All I ever see is this unequal balance where people are either too clingy or too aloof with each other, and I see the destructive impact it has on relationships too. One guy needs the girl more than the girl needs the guy (or vice versa), creating an inequitable bond that can only lead to ruin.
As for me, maybe I simply got old, but I’m starting to see a change in myself where I just don’t give a flying leap anymore. I think this is the product of years of unrequited love and the need for survival, reaching the tipping point where I finally end up as one of those free-spirited guys who have embraced and married the single life, though at the cost of losing all natural affection for the opposite sex. And while “physical needs” may still die hard, that can easily be satisfied by perusing the services of the world’s oldest profession. 
I have to admit, it sounds like a GREAT life. 
Tags: affection, companion, companionship, female companionship, free spirit, friendship, independent, relationship, single, unrequited, unrequited love, women, yearning
Categories: Romance and Relationships
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Loading ...Wanna know where I’d be if this blog were a financial success?
Lincoln Adams | August 31, 2008 @ 3:15 pmDirectly in Hurricane Gustav’s path, that’s where. 
Well… maybe not exactly in its path. I don’t think I’d be that crazy, but I’d definitely be down there, volunteering wherever I could to help people get ready or escort them out of the area if possible.
And then I might just stick around near the coastline for some snapshots and video that I could upload to my blog.
Ok maybe I am a little crazy. I don’t really value my life that much anyway, and since I don’t have a house or a family of my own that I’d be leaving behind, who would miss me? 
Seriously though, this is what I would live for. Without being tied down to a job or a house, I’d be a free spirit able to roam anywhere in the country, and since my income would be drawn from my blog earnings, I’d have more time to volunteer for any charity driven projects that I come across during my travels.
In fact, if my blog were already enjoying financial success, I’d probably be in Mississippi or Louisiana now, Red-Crossing my way around the states for a while and then driving down to the coastline so I can watch Gustav cross over. After all, nothing says fun like being trapped in a category 5 hurricane.
I’m not sure why, there’s just something about massively violent storms that truly warms the cackles of my heart. I was actually born during a hurricane too, the lights flickering on and off in the hospital while the entire building shook and rumbled from the sheer force of the hurricane winds. Total chaos while the doctors delivered me, the same way you might expect it to be if it was the Antichrist himself being born. 
It was said that the circumstances of my birth was an omen of things to come. Hee hee.
But seriously…
I may not be able to achieve my financial goals with this blog anytime soon, but since I will be debt free in a few months, and my site still generates a modest income, if I can’t break free I might at least be able to extend the rope that’s been tying me down, and travel in short spurts here and there instead. Since I regularly have four days off every other week, I’ll have the opportunity to take extended weekend road trips to wherever I want to go, and I’ll be able to blog about it all too. For the short term that’s an entirely feasible goal for me, and if I keep paying down my debts at the rate I’m doing, by this time next year it may all become a reality. Baby steps here, baby steps. 
In the meantime, my prayers go out to all those in the path of Gustav, and hope that the damage won’t be as extensive or as destructive as many of us originally feared.
Tags: birth, blog, charity, dream, free spirit, goals, hurricane gustav, hurricanes, income, nomad, prayers, road trip, storm, storms, travel, travels, tzedakah, volunteering
Categories: Lincoln's Personal Log
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