After weeks of despairing over whether I should attend law school or not, I eventually began to forget why I even wanted to become a lawyer in the first place. Then a few things happened this week:

A friend and co-worker of mine is currently dealing with an out of control boss who recently got in his face the other day. From what I hear, she was one unstable psychopath who got transferred to his department because HQ couldn’t deal with her. She had a history of micromanaging others, emotional outbursts and other inappropriate behavior. One day she was pulling her usual stunts and when my friend confronted her (nicely) about it, she went ape. Got up and wagged her finger in his face, literally screaming her head off. My friend was afraid for his safety, because not only was she acting completely unhinged, she was also packing a gun. Not a very healthy combination if you ask me.

So now my friend has to have a meeting with the higher ups along with union reps and other parties to sort this crap out. I asked him if he felt she was going to hit him when she got in his face, and when I did my mind immediately started thinking, “She may have assaulted him, since she placed him in an imminent apprehension of a battery. He has a legal cause of action here.” Suddenly, it was like several lights had gone on inside my head. I was beginning to remember.

Considering what my friend now has to deal with because of this incident, it occurred to me: what he needed was a good lawyer.

Then I had another friend who was applying to take a civil service exam as a typist. The exam only required one year’s clerical experience, and since she had been in the workforce for so many years doing all kinds of jobs, including those that required clerical skills, she figured there’d be no problem.

They rejected her. Took the application fee she paid and rejected her for lack of experience. !??!?!?! It wasn’t a mistake either. This is a woman with a college education, and she was barred from even TAKING the civil exam for lack of clerical experience?? She felt her civil rights had been violated.

Once again it occurred to me: what she needed was a good lawyer.

Now I remember why I wanted to be an attorney: JUSTICE. I wanted justice for these people. They had been WRONGED, and as I listened to these stories, I was the guy who wanted to make it RIGHT again. For me, being an attorney wasn’t about making money. It wasn’t about drawing up wills, or working corporate law, or working in a big time law firm so I could make partner after sweating blood for 10 or 20 years.

No, it was all about making things RIGHT again. It was about bringing peace where chaos existed, finding reconciliation between two aggrieved parties, defending the defenseless, and protecting the rights of the poor.

It was about JUSTICE.

I always knew what I wanted to do in life, and I realized that itself was never the problem. It was finding the proper medium in which I could fulfill these lifelong desires that had been the subject of so much agonizing and confusion. What field could help me make the kind of difference I was seeking to make? As I realize the answer to that question, I also realize that this is an endeavor that can only succeed if God blesses it.

Where there is no God, there is no justice. If I choose the legal profession, I need to be able to choose it with the knowledge that God will be int it, and that he will honor the desires of my heart to make things right again.