Based on my observations on how people make money online, one of the largest streams of income tend to come from affiliate marketing. I figured if I was ever going to make a living off the Internet myself, most of my attention and efforts would have to focus on generating commissions for affiliate programs I participate in.

After dabbling in this industry on and off for the past few months, I have come to this conclusion: I F*&%ING HATE AFFILIATE MARKETING.

The truth is, I’m not a salesman. In fact I utterly hate and despise everything about the business field, partly because it generally requires that you be a bottom feeding scum sucking scumbag in order to be successful. Not that everyone in this field is, but there’s a temptation to debase yourself and lie your fat baboon’s heinie off to rope naive consumers into buying the products you hawk. How anyone can do this on a full time basis is beyond me, but I guess the dollar signs in their eyes are enough to keep them going.

I tried to understand all the fine nuances of effective affiliate marketing, from running PPC campaigns to creating effective landing pages to formulating effective bidding strategies for high converting keywords, and on and on and on. My brain furiously protested this infusion of insane information, mostly by constipating itself and spiting me by making me forget what I apartment I lived in every time I went out to get the mail. And when I still continued to persist, my brain launched an all out attack by giving me nightmares of a naked Barbra Streisand chasing after me with a bullwhip and a bottle of suntan lotion. Eventually, I got the message.

The thing was, I wasn’t being true to myself. I was trying to learn something I had no passion or love for, and I did it only because that’s where the money seemed to be.

But I’m not a businessman. What I am, is a romantic. Someone who loves to take pictures, tell stories, sing songs, and dance and twirl in the summer rain to the tune of Air Supply. I wanted to celebrate life, not milk it. Affiliate marketing ran contrary not only to my moral structure, but also to who I was as a person. The more I tried to persist in learning all the tricks of the trade, the more miserable I became. It’s not worth it.

In the end I decided to limit any affiliated related marketing I do in the future to products I actually use myself. If people decide to buy through my affiliate links, great, and if they don’t, the sun will still come up tomorrow.

I’ll just have to find nontraditional ways to generate income online, which is fine by me. Whatever sets me apart from the rest, it’s all for the best, and even if I don’t know how I’ll do it, I believe I can make success…

….out of nothing at all.

Out of nothing at alllllll….

Out of nothing at alllllllllllllll….

Black-hat affiliate marketers follow a common pattern in their efforts to liberate you of your money. Once they decide on a niche, they then sign up for the most lucrative affiliate programs that appeal to that particular niche, and then they’re off to work their dark magic. As a case study, let’s take a look at how such marketing was done for appetite suppressants, specifically Hoodia.

Now if they’re the sort to go apesh*% nuts in their marketing campaign (and the more successful ones usually do), their next step is to buy dozens upon dozens of domains that have the kind of keywords they’re looking for. Since they want to market Hoodia, the domains they buy might look like this:

…and on and on and on. Literally hundreds of domains may be bought prior to launching their campaigns. Once that’s done, they begin the process of building landing pages for each domain. These pages take on the appearance of a normal looking website, but there are certain distinct characteristics they have that can help us detect whether it’s authentic, or whether it was built by an affiliate spammer. Here’s one example. It purports to be a Hoodia Review site, but there are several telltale signs that should give you pause:

• The page has a vanilla or light appearance. Content is light, dry and impersonal.
• There’s no contact info.
• The date shown on the top right is automated, made to appear as if the content is continuously being updated when it isn’t.
• None of the external links are organic, but are routed using a cloaked redirect. Simply put, an organic link means the actual, natural link to a site. Instead of a simple, organic link however, a redirect is used to hide what’s actually an affiliate link. You won’t know the actual link address until you click on it, and by that time a cookie will likely have been placed in your browser, so even if you backtrack and end up purchasing the same product another day, the affiliate marketer may still receive a commission, depending on the rules of the affiliate program he’s using for that link.

Now take a look at the table near the bottom, listing the ratings for each product. You can bet that it’s suspect. The ratings are completely arbitrary and are based on absolutely no user input at all. This isn’t a Consumer Reports type of site where extensive testing was done to determine the quality of a product here. The affiliate marketer simply made it all up. The top picks are probably only top picks because they offered the best payouts for him.

Note that the links in this table are ALL affiliate links too. Aside from having no user input or testimonies where individuals who’ve tried these products can relay their personal experiences, there’s no other external link of any kind to any editorial source (except for Google Ads of course), and that’s all by design. The affiliate spammer doesn’t want any external link to compete with the affiliate ones, that way he can be assured that the only links you’ll be clicking on are the ones that will make him money. Wasn’t that thoughtful of him?

Once the game has been set up and the landing pages are ready to go, it’s just a matter of running a series of PPC (pay per click) and SEO (search engine optimization) related campaigns to bring targeted traffic to these fake review sites.

Now think about it. There are a countless number of these affiliate marketers all competing to get a commission out of you, all using similar methods. Put them all together and what you have are literally hundreds to thousands of fake websites polluting Google’s search results, especially when it involves a niche that is notoriously prone to this kind of spam. That’s why when you do a search for “hoodia reviews,” you could go ten pages or more into the search results before finally finding a site that’s actually real. And maybe not even.

Hopefully though, what I’ve written here will help you keep a better eye out for these fake, affiliate based websites. Just remember, if you visit one of these sites and happen to click on an affiliate link, make sure you clear your cookies afterwards. That way if you actually do decide to buy the product in question, the affiliate spammer won’t receive any credit for it.

A while back I wrote an in-depth post on how an online scammer was promoting cures for ulcers, shingles, warts and whatnot, all packaged in eBooks you download for a fee.

It’s time to take that a little further and dissect how these scumbags run their games online, especially when they’re working as affiliate marketers.

One particular affiliate marketer recently clued his audience in on how he might typically run his campaigns, and what he reveals is pretty telling. It starts out by picking out what affiliate programs they want to join, which is often accomplished by joining a major affiliate network like Commission Junction, and then performing a search for affiliate programs that offer the highest payouts in the niches they’re interested in.

In this case, diet pills were chosen. The marketer then set out to build what’s called a landing page (in this case a landing page is a website that’s designed to encourage the visitor to click on affiliate links and eventually buy the products mentioned, resulting in commission profits for the marketer.) Look at what he writes:

…I used a review page. I included those offers in a list, and picked an order I wanted. Based on the EPCs my affiliate managers told me, I put the highest offer as the #1 and called it the “Top Rated”, and then the lowest EPC I put at the bottom and rated “Good Choice”. They each were rated 1 to 5 stars. The top rated was 5 stars, and the bottom of the list was 3 stars. You don’t want to rate everything five stars or else it looks fake, and people can tell.

He built a fake review page with a ratings system that had nothing to do with the quality of the products in question. They were actually rated in terms of what would generate the most profits for him!

I sold myself as a legit review site that was there to help the visitor find the best diet pill for them.

In truth he had no interest in helping the visitor make an informed decision at all, but every interest in getting their money. Virtually no effort was made to research the quality of the products he was marketing, or provide original content that weren’t merely borrowed advertising slogans. The only thing that mattered was the bottom line: converting visits to profits. That he would lie and provide misleading information to do so bothers him, not at all.

It’s disconcerting to see a 19 year old punk exhibit such moral ineptness so early in his life, perfectly content in sacrificing his integrity and promoting low quality goods that pollute the Internet, just so he can churn a good profit. And why not? After all, he has already raked in close to a million dollars already with his “marketing” efforts. But then again, drug dealers do pretty good for themselves as well. So do scumbag lawyers. And spammers. And the Russian mob.

This post is already a bit long, so in another post I’ll analyze how these “landing pages” operate, and provide a live example so readers can learn how to successfully detect whether a website was built by an affiliate spammer or not. Stay tuned!

In all my years on this planet, I don’t think I’ve ever kept a single New Year’s resolution. Doesn’t stop me from making them though.

Still, there’s something about the coming year that makes me think I may be in for something different this time. The number 8 is said to symbolize new beginnings, and man, after this awful stretch I’ve been in since the turn of the millennium, a new beginning sounds just like what the doctor ordered.

Here’s what I hope I’ll be able to accomplish in 2008:

1. Clear up my health problems and get strong again (vith ripplin’ mosscles to impress de vooomen.)
2. Generate a stable income of at least $1250 a month via my blog.
3. Get out of my dead end job and find a new career, whether it’s with another agency or by becoming self employed.
4. Move somewhere else, either out of state, or to nowhere in particular, depending on how successful I am in earning a living off the Internet.
5. Meet the girl of my dreams.

As you can see, I have very modest ambitions.

Even though my basic goals of moving and finding a new job are the same, they may be realized in different ways. I might settle for simply finding another job (possibly with the feds) and moving to wherever that new job might be, but ultimately I would like to be self employed, and earn a living by blogging and perhaps doing affiliate marketing online. Doing so would allow me to fulfill what’s been a growing dream of mine: to travel and live from state to state as a working nomad, where the road would be my home. I’ve never felt at home here, and the thought of being tied down to one job in one location for x amount of years is about as appealing to me as doing time on Rikers Island.

Besides, I’ve always harbored the suspicion that my dream girl was never anybody local, and if I were to find her I needed the freedom of being able to travel and stay anywhere.

So, will 2008 be THE year? Time will tell, but it’s looking more and more like my fate will ultimate hang on 2008. As for 2007, I bid good riddance to that crapola of a year.

See you all on the other side!

I hate to get sucked into entering yet another blogging contest, especially when they are usually transparent efforts to build backlinks to their sites, but this one was too good to pass up.

David Airey is a graphic designer who, oddly enough, specializes in logo and graphic design, and is currently running a contest giving away $4,000 worth of prizes on his blog, which by the way covers the niche of… wait for it… logo design.

That should provide enough suitable context links to make Airey happy and get me into the contest, but just to boost my chances of winning, I’ll list most of the nifty prizes that’s being offered by his sponsors here, but only if y’all promise not to enter the contest too and thus diminish my chances of winning.

The gold (grand) prize offers a free… wait for it… logo design (from David Airey of course), a WordPress theme design by Nate Whitehill, a personal marketing and advertising plan from Dosh Dosh, one year of free hosting and blog setup from I Love Typography , and a signed copy of Blogging Tips by Lorelle Van Fossen, which I already have a copy of being the Lorelle groupie fan that I am.

One thing I really want out of that list of goodies is Nate’s offer of a theme design. That’s worth several hundred bones right there, and I could really use an expert to fix some of the more grating issues that’s been plaguing my theme since I started blogging. Rather than clean up my own mess though, I think it’d be nice to have somebody else do it for me. :hubahuba:

As for the other prizes, I thought I’d have a little fun here and list them to the tune of Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start The Fire.”

Logo designs by Roskell, whose name I think does ring a bell, site critiques by Randa Clay, who’ll tell you how to find your way, one hour SEO, linkbaits and promos, $60 worth of books, a problogger who’s not a crook…

Logo design, (not again!), blog optimizing, blog reviews and blogging tips, blogging that and blogging this, WordPress designing, what to do, what to do, never fear, help is here, Brian will take care of you!

We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning!
We didn’t start the fire, no we didn’t light it but we tried to fight it!

Podcasting studio, from affiliate and marketing, Mom Gadget , free money, isn’t she a real honey, 3 USB sticks, help you get your hacking fix, Terenia in Edinburgh, they’ll thank me for this little blurb, blog reviews in Blog-Op, WordPress themes from Aaron Russell, Mareddy and her WordPress skills, Marketing Tools Review, hopefully provide a clue, blog writing consultations, all this and more frustrations, time to take a long vacation!

We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning!
We didn’t start the fire, no we didn’t light it but we tried to fight it!

Coaching creative professionals, they’ll coach and coach and tell it all, business growth consulting, contract negotiations, a mediator and conflict coach, to keep you all from getting poached, always room for blog improvement, will all this even make a dent???

A banner day for banner ads, all on Blog Experiment, image ads, here and there, don’t have to pay a red cent, a guy who’s Smart Wealthy Rich, providing such a healthy kick, still won’t help me find my niche, but he’ll grant an advertising pitch!

We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning!
We didn’t start the fire, no we didn’t light it but we tried to fight it!

Contest Blogger, Freelance Folder, getting bolder, and getting older, lifetime membership, with tips, tips, and more tips, WordPress SEO, just sit back and watch the show, but lookie here, there’s no one here, cuz I ran out of prizes, now I’ll gamble with a ramble, to the end of a blogging age, taking this, all the way, WHAT ELSE DO I HAVE TO SAY???

We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning!
We didn’t start the fire, no we didn’t light it but we tried to fight it!

Yahoo, Google too, keyword stuffing, splogging too, stumblers, tumblers, and MySpace with its stalkers, Facebook and API, everything for you and I, search bots hits all the spots, del.icio.us, please stop the dots, Adsense, earning cents, Diggsters and their nonsense, carnivals, reddit geeks, podcasting, YouTube flings, text link ads, are they bad, hope it’s not another fad, show me where to find the door, CUZ I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!

We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning!
We didn’t start the fire, no we didn’t light it but we tried to fight it!

We didn’t start the fire, it was always burning since the world’s been turning!
We didn’t start the fire, no we didn’t light it but we tried to fight it……..

A guest blogger at JohnChow.com challenged the audience in commiting to writing at least one blogging post a day for 20 days. Apparently if you make something a part of your daily routine for about three weeks, it will eventually become a habit and thus a routine that will be easier to stick to.

I decided to answer the challenge as well, since one of the big problems I’ve had in getting this blog going was my history of erratic posting frequency. I have to admit I was actually afraid to link to Chow’s blog because he’s currently in the Google doghouse for engaging in controversial link building. I thought if Google saw that I linked to his site, they would think that I was another evil fan of his and then blacklist me from their search index for all eternity, forever doomed to the dark pits of internet obscurity.

I think I worry too much.

As for what’s holding me back, I think the main reason is TIME. I’m spending a lot of time working at my job, catching up on my news feeds, tweaking my site, reading up on affiliate marketing, learning about microstock photography, gaming, watching TV, staring into empty space, just about everything EXCEPT blogging. I make no time for it at all, and it shows.

There’s another reason for this though: I have nothing to write about. Well nothing that I think will at least interest anybody. I think my writing sucks monkey’s balls too. No matter how good an idea I have for a blogging post, it never seems to translate well on “paper.” Somewhere in the blogging process things get jammed up and the end result is mindless crap. Maybe as I attempt to blog more often things will get better. Maybe not.

Maybe I need a life. Maybe I need a woman too.