“Lonely Teacher Looks For Loving Pet”

Is it me, or does it seem like women are getting married at earlier and earlier ages these days? Or am I just getting older and older? :ohwell:

I blame Christians for this (naturally), particularly those within the Bible Belt who push to get their daughters married by the time they’re 18, so by the time they’re 25 they will have already loaded themselves down with 7 kids and done their part to keep God’s army of little cherubs going. Don’t get me wrong, I love kids, but honestly, how many of these disgusting little snotbags does a family really need to have anyway?

#%$ Christians.

But I guess if I wanna up my chances of meeting a nice, Christian girl, then I’m gonna have to catch them young. Really young. Like maybe before they graduate high school young. Yet another reason why the teaching profession appeals to me. :naughty:

Of course they’ll probably still have dweebish boyfriends then, but I can clear that hurdle easily enough once I home in on some cute girl who has potential, then it’s just a matter of cornering her dork beau in a dark alley somewhere and wailing on him until he promises never to call or go near her again.

And when she’s depressed and lonely and wondering why her pimple faced sweetheart doesn’t love her anymore, I’ll be there to give her all the comfort she needs.

Of course I’ll probably only be able to enjoy the relationship for about 5 minutes before I get tossed into the slammer. Ah well, life can be so cruel sometimes.

Tags: bible belt, christian, Christians, dating, dating pool, high school, humor, teacher
Categories: Romance and Relationships

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8 Responses to ““Lonely Teacher Looks For Loving Pet””

Rebecca wrote a comment on June 3, 2008 @ 02:59:pm
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Keep talking, and before you know it, you’ll be on the Jerry Springer Show…

John wrote a comment on June 3, 2008 @ 03:14:pm
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You are teh nutz!

Lincoln Adams wrote a comment on June 3, 2008 @ 03:18:pm
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You mean it’s still on the air? :blink:

Deborah wrote a comment on June 3, 2008 @ 04:55:pm
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You just explained the thought process of someone I went to school with (I assume because I never asked him). He was coaching trach at a junior high and started a relationship with a student. Apparently their families discovered what was happening and told them to knock it off but since love was in the air they just had to be together. The police arrested him on kidnapping and other charges in the middle of the night when she had crept out her window to meet him at his waiting car. He has become quite the laughing stock of the town because frankly if the best someone can do is a fourteen year old what does that say about them?? :loser:

Lincoln Adams wrote a comment on June 3, 2008 @ 05:03:pm
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14 years old?? That’s just pathetic.

Sweet Sixteens are much better.

ConsrvYank1 wrote a comment on June 4, 2008 @ 12:04:pm
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I find the opposite to be true. I think people are marrying later in life, rather than sooner. I think the main reason is that now women are finding it easier to support themselves. In the old days, that was not always true.

Rebecca wrote a comment on June 4, 2008 @ 12:54:pm
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I find the opposite to be true. I think people are marrying later in life, rather than sooner. I think the main reason is that now women are finding it easier to support themselves. In the old days, that was not always true.

:banana: