I was recently sent these Sarah Palin banners:

Kudos to CalTech Girl for coming up with these awesome poster images.  If you want to use them as well for your site, please include a credit link back to her blog!

Whether it’s Palin or otherwise, conservative babes are HAWT. 

Tags: conservative, posters, presidential campaign, sarah palin
Categories: Politics and Poker
 
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It’s no secret that I’ve been raging against all things estrogen for the better part of the year now, having given up on the female race as being entirely irredeemable and utterly given over to the cause of evil.

And then someone like Sarah Palin comes along and helps me restore my faith somewhat.  Maybe, just maybe, all is not completely lost.

McCain’s astonishing VP pick (and current governor of Alaska) is gorgeous, articulate, smart, conservative, accomplished, and by all appearances a devout Christian too.  She’s also a member of the NRA.    Oh, and she’s gorgeous as well.  Did I mention she’s gorgeous? 

In short, she’s everything I could have ever wanted in a woman.  Someone who embraces her femininity, but is still a tomboy of sorts who would grind you to ashes if you ever did her dirty.  They don’t call her Barracuda for nothing after all.    More importantly, her attractive appeal is grounded in her intelligence and principled beliefs, demonstrated in one part by in her refusal to abort her child she knew would be born with Down’s syndrome.  Meanwhile others who profess to be Christians have no moral aversion to supporting a candidate like the Obamanation, who stops just short of endorsing mass infancitide. 

Being awash in a sea of underwhelming females who spend half their days with their noses buried in Vogue magazines and their heads up Obama’s goomie gumbos, Palin arrives like a breath of fresh air.

Thank you Sarah Palin.  Thank you for helping me believe once again for the impossible, that there may just be another one like you out there, and that maybe someday soon, God will finally bring us together. 

Tags: christian, Christians, conservative, femininity, God, intelligence, john mccain, love, Obamanation, presidential campaign, presidential election, sarah palin, tomboy, woman
Categories: Politics and Poker, Romance and Relationships
 
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*Yawn*

I’m having a boring week here, which translates into having nothing to write about on my blog, which translates into my life sucks and I just wanna die, wah wah wah, I want my Mommy.

I am SO glad summer’s just about over though.  Unlike normal people, I hate summer.  LOATHE it in fact.  It brings me nothing but sheer, excruciating heat, and sheer, excruciating humidity.  I can’t wear my super cool looking clothes and jackets either, because nature precludes me from donning clothing meant for fall and winter climates when it’s 90 degrees out.  All I can do is throw on a boring shirt and shorts and walk around looking like a dweeb, while my feet melt in stylish, yet toast oven hot sneakers because I absolutely refuse, REFUSE to wear flip-flops or sandals, all of which are utterly unworthy of being grouped in the same class as shoes.  I don’t know why, I just hate those things.  There’s just something about hearing the flap flap flappity flippity flop of a flip-flop that makes me burn with murderous rage.

Yes I know, I have issues.  Bite me.

Fortunately though, as the heat starts to wane, I start to mellow out a bit.  Once Labor Day comes around I start coming out of my summer fog like a bear out of hibernation, when it finally sinks in that the worst has past, and things will once again start looking up from here.  The weather gets cooler, the air gets more crisp, the holidays get more frequent, and the leaves turn more brilliant as we get closer to autumn, by far my favorite season of all time.

But I think what really sells it for me is how quietly empty the streets become, signaling that ever celebrated event when snot-nosed vile little monkey turds that society calls children finally go back to school again.

Ahhhhh, September, how I missed thee. 

Tags: autumn, bored, children, climate, clothes, flip flops, heat, humidity, summer, weather
Categories: Lincoln's Personal Log
 
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There are some days when God just seems to smile on me… almost as if He had forgotten that I was supposed to be a marked man and as a result let a blessing through by accident. 

This one came in the form of only having to pay $300 for auto body work which would have normally cost me as much as $1,900 had I gone with somebody else.  They even polished it too!

So I was outside cleaning up my sleek black ride afterwards, and putting a new hitch cover in when I heard, “Wow that’s a NICE ride!”

I looked up and it was an old dude.  “Yep, sure is.”

He then hooked me into a conversation, and after chatting a bit about my baby, he seemed surprised that I had gotten the car out of state.  That was the only way I could get it for under the invoice price though, which is virtually unheard of in this town.

“My daughter is looking to buy just this car too,” he said.

“Is she seeing anybody?”  I quickly asked.

“Uh, no…, um, she’s married and has two kids.”

“Oh.”

Awkward silence.

“Well it was nice talking to you.  Again, nice car!”  He quickly walked away.

Was it something I said? 

Tags: auto body work, car, conversation, God, ride, social skills, talk
Categories: Lincoln's Personal Log
 
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Hard times call for more inventive ways of doing things:

BBQ on the cheap.

Local autobody repairing vehicle at discount rates.

Who needs Bluetooth when duct tape will do?

Discount Skydiving

What thieves do when they can’t afford burglary tools.

Tags: cheap, discount, funny, Photos
Categories: Comic Relief, Photos
 
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You know the handwriting’s on the wall when a personal ad I respond to on Craigslist turns out to be spam.  Whoops. 

Now before you start ragging on me for surfing Craiglist, I was bored, ok?  BORED.  I was checking out apartment prices and then out of curiousity (and absolutely nothing else) I checked out the personals for my area.  That’s when I came across this one:

Okay so here is the deal: I am an attractive 28 year old woman who tends to attract emotionally unavailable men….of course! So basically I am trying this out too see if this “dream guy” actually exists. I would be interested in a man who is attractive (I am a face person) with a great smile/great teeth. I tend to be attracted to men who are not thin or overly muscular. I like a man to have a little meat on his body. I love to laugh and am looking for someone who can make me laugh. I am a born again Christian and would like him to be the same. I love music and love to sing. I also love animals and could not imagine someone not loving them too! I am fairly low maintainance (who also may not be able to spell the word…HAHA). I am somewhat of a homebody and dont need to go out all the time. I am interested in a man who is caring, thoughtful, a “team player”, handy, outgoing, moderately successful, and “real”. I am a very genuine person who’s biggest weakness is my “big heart”. I am thoughtful, caring, and have been told I can “light up a room”. Being my own worse critic I would like to be a little thinner. However, I do have great curves and the softest skin! I came to this website because I really believe that I am a “great catch”. PS) hair is red by choice not by nature!

Seems like a nice enough girl right?  So I emailed her and asked her how strong she considered her Christian beliefs to be.  I got a response shortly afterwards:

Hi, I got your email and wanted to get back with you to see if you might still be interested.  I know you don’t know much about me but you can at least go see what I look like at http://www.eimages.info/barbera21. I posted them on this free site to make this whole “getting to know you” thing a little easier.  Just tell me what you think & if you want, a little about yourself and we will go from there.  Thank you.

When you click on the link however, it actually turns out to be a phony one and is in fact a redirected AFFILIATE link that takes you to the signup page of a dating site.

This whole time I had been communicating with an automated script that had been set up by an affiliate marketer spammer. 

I should have had the foresight to Google some of the phrases in the Craigslist ad to see if it showed up elsewhere, and sure enough the exact same wording shows up on a profile page at PlentyofFish, only this time she hails from Michigan.

Sigh.  And people wonder why I’ve become so bitter and cynical in my old age.

I consider myself to be a somewhat intelligent person, and if I got fooled by this, I’m sure many others have as well, especially as these bottom feeding scum of the earth affiliate marketers get more and more sophisticated in using deceptive methods to make money.  Just make sure, if you experienced something similar and you were tricked into clicking on an affiliate link that leads to a signup page, flush the cookies in your browser, so even if you happen to sign up for that very site in question a few months or so down the road, the spammer won’t get credit for it (affiliate links typically insert cookies into your browser that can last several months to over a year.  Read my article on affiliate spam for more info.)

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be drowning my sorrows in Dairy Queen’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Blizzard.  Oh wait, there’s no Dairy Queen around here.  Sigh, not even this huh, Lord? 

Tags: affiliate, affiliate links, affiliate marketer, affiliate spammer, christian, craigslist, dating, personal, personals, spam, spammer
Categories: Tangled Webs
 
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