Why are Christians Such *&%#ing Idiots?

There’s been another “revival” going down in Florida (it’s always Florida) where people have been experiencing healings and miracles and walking away with gold teeth even. (Really, gold teeth now? Why not drop some gold bonds into our laps instead? Seems that would be far more constructive than having to get one of my chompers ripped out just so I can cash in on some heavenly manna.)

Anyway… at least one healing allegedly went awry though when a pastor suffering from bone cancer died only a week later after he was pronounced healed by the repugnant looking Todd Bentley (really dude, how much metal can you possibly jam into your eyebrows there? Though I guess I shouldn’t say anything, since God supposedly told you to mutilate your body… repeatedly… all for His glory I’m sure.)

After I chimed in with my own thoughts on the story at Word N’ Verse, I noticed a comment in response to Isaiah’s post that to put it mildly, was bonknuts insane:

…But blame shifting is not the answer my friend. Todd Bentley believe that God’s word is true - just as you do. Therefore, he can say without any doubt that, “We are healed.” Todd is not the healer. God is. And we are not Todd’s judge. God is.

Good grief what an idiot. Supposing Larry Reed’s story is true (I can’t confirm whether it is), it’s obvious in this context Bentley was declaring that Reed was physically healed, and wasn’t merely speaking in metaphorical terms. Reed after all didn’t make that trip just so he could be reassured that we’re all metaphorically/spiritually healed in Christ, ‘Praise the Lord, Amen’ and all that jazz. He was looking for an actual HEALING.

Bentley made a false declaration, plain and simple. To infer that he was speaking merely in metaphorical terms is ridiculous and offensive.

So what went wrong then? I don’t know, maybe the angels that were assigned to do Reed’s healing were too busy gathering money from the four corners of the earth to support Bentley’s lifestyle that they just couldn’t get to the poor guy in time.

Seriously, this guy is like a Harley Davidson version of Benny Hinn, and you’d think by now people would finally warm up to the shenanigans of these holy rolling scam artists and realize how they’ve been getting jerked around all these years. But nope, proclamations of meeting up with Paul in heaven and conversing with girlie angels named Emma only has the masses begging for more.

Although…. I wonder if Emma is single? Hey, I always believed the girl of my dreams would be an angel from heaven, so maybe if Bentley Boy can hook me up, I might decide not to be so critical of his ministry.

Nah, I’ll do it myself, *picks up cell phone*

“Hello, Information? Give me Jesus on the line….”

Tags: apostasy, benny hinn, counterfeit, fake, false, healings, heresies, lakeland revival, miracles, todd bentley
Categories: Christians Gone Wild

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15 Responses to “Why are Christians Such *&%#ing Idiots?”

Mrs. Mecomber wrote a comment on May 27, 2008 @ 09:49:pm
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Just because one guy isn’t healed doesn’t mean God doesn’t heal. Healing is scriptural.

It’s a stretch to dismiss revivals, Christianity, healings, and miracles because one guy is kooky.

Lincoln Adams wrote a comment on May 27, 2008 @ 09:59:pm
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@MrsMecomber: I don’t dismiss healings or revivals altogether, just this one.

(And a few others…. ok more than a few others…) :ggrin:

Mrs. Mecomber wrote a comment on May 28, 2008 @ 11:14:am
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Well that’s a relief! For a sec I wondered if you’d turned heretic or something.

Not necessarily aimed toward you, but your post makes me re-realize that a whole lot of energy seems directed on “heretic chasing” but so little energy in the American Church today is toward holiness and virtuous service to God, without which a Christian is not a Christian. The words of 2 Timothy 3:1-7 are unfolding before our eyes, and it is not the gospel message that is at fault here. But sinners don’t realize that, they just brand Christians as “hypocrites” and divided, and therefore they dismiss Jesus’ message. It’s sad.

Natural Woman wrote a comment on May 28, 2008 @ 01:17:pm
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wow, i always go to the doctor when i’m sick. doesn’t mean i don’t believe God can do it….

Lincoln Adams wrote a comment on May 28, 2008 @ 03:12:pm
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LOL, you must believe a lot of Baptists are heretics then. I do think bona fide healings exist, but because of the state of the churches today they are rare and drowned out by these counterfeit revivals.

Most of these miracles I suspect happen overseas in places like China too, not in the U.S.

Mrs. Mecomber wrote a comment on May 28, 2008 @ 04:45:pm
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LOL, you must believe a lot of Baptists are heretics then.

I was Baptist once. WAS. Then, by golly, I read the Bible, and believed what it said! lol. (readers, skip the hate mail; I’ve heard it all)

Most of these miracles I suspect happen overseas in places like China too, not in the U.S. …healings exist, but because of the state of the churches today they are rare

John Chysostom and John Wesley said the same thing. It’s a crying shame, IMHO. But healings do take place in the U.S.– that’s for sure. The Holy Ghost is alive and well everywhere! :angelna:

Cheryl wrote a comment on May 28, 2008 @ 06:15:pm
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I think we need a second Reformation and dispense with this emotionalism. Some Christians can be a little too embarrassing in the intellectual department.

Lincoln Adams wrote a comment on May 28, 2008 @ 08:28:pm
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What we need is a revival, a real one. One that moves people to repentance, not looking for angels that can bring them cold hard cash. :eyeroll:

Caseyc wrote a comment on May 29, 2008 @ 12:52:am
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Unfortunately many Christians seem to lack basic powers of discernment. Many an atheist has had a good laugh starting an urban myth that gets swallowed hook line and sinker by gullible Christians. I believe in physical healings as well, just not the kind that can be called down from above at will. Name it and claim it doesn’t hold water.

Lincoln Adams wrote a comment on May 29, 2008 @ 12:59:am
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It’s gotten to the point where I can’t abide by it anymore. If I was at a revival and the pastor made an altar call by saying “Come get some!” I would have gone up there and beaten the snot out of him. Then I’d get a pair of pliers and twist his eyebrow rings off just for good measure.

Not that I had anyone specific in mind though. This is merely hypothetically speaking. :angelgrin:

Mrs. Mecomber wrote a comment on May 29, 2008 @ 09:28:am
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Great comments.

One church I went to actually encouraged the members to be idiots. They quoted the verse “God has chosen the foolish things of the world… not many noble, not many mighty…” So that gave them an excuse to be dumb!

Lincoln Adams wrote a comment on May 29, 2008 @ 07:06:pm
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Willful ignorance is a wee bit different from being born stupid. I claim the latter. :shades:

Kelly wrote a comment on July 8, 2008 @ 03:58:am
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I think my eyes need healing after THAT post.

Juggy wrote a comment on September 11, 2008 @ 03:50:pm
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i’ll never come back to this website again so i don’t care what you say, even though its been a while since anyone has posted anyway but i would just like to say that when i read the article i was really happy because i believed i had found something which really tells everyone how stupid christians are, unfortunately the comments made me vomit. Get over yourselfs, God isn’t real and no one gets magically healed by some old scavy guy with rabies and just to say:

text the words “god loves you” to 20 mates and get a free dancing jesus screensaver for your mobile!!!

All christians are gay

God isnt real even though i love him and blame him for all of my problems fhghsjksfhjkfjksdgfjks

omg i h8 sk8rs thy r so gay, lol!!

…. well my slang seems tto be slightly different to whoever wrote the note at the bottom as flame-bait sounds stupid so ill say nothing more about that…

i heard lincoln adams had an all male orgy in early 2007… not very christian or manly of him…

bye bye

p.s. in case you stupid christians didn’t guess i added a little bit so you will have to delete this loads of times…. does stupid christians count as flame-bait? ah whatever *******!!!!!

i know this probably has nothing to do with christianity but what’s the point of being a vegetarian? and why isn’t there enough people hating religions in this world?